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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Have you ever been so stressed that you’re calm?

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

I hate Valentine’s Day but I do enjoy infant archery.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

I can resist everything except temptation.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Jewelry stores should just be like: Whether you’re trying to be nice or trying to get laid, we got you covered.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

I’m just a crazy person looking for a crazy person who finds me completely normal.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

(While my wife opens up her Christmas present) Remember when you said we needed milk?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Being informed is the worst thing I’ve ever done for my mental health.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

Another fine day ruined by waking up.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,853

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

Donating blood today to make room for more food.

Just landed via Facebook:

Most women need a little reassurance. Like when she says “oh, you want to see crazy?” Reassure her that you do not.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I love coming home and being at home and sitting inside my home and staying home.

Spotted on Twitch:

Transgender ambulance driver whose pronouns are we/you/we/you/we/you.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

Just shared via YouTube:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Breaking via Discord:

I thought my wrinkles were finally getting smaller, but it turns out my eyes were just getting worse.

Trending via Slack:

Stop being so boyfriendable if you can’t be my boyfriend.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Not my room, not my elephant.

Going viral on TikTok:

I was googling about the best time to visit the Maldives. It’s when you have money.

My life plans are fading like Marty McFly’s family photo.

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My life plans are fading like Marty McFly’s family photo.
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Commentary:
"BRB, trying to hit 88 mph to save my plans! 🚗💨📸 #BackToReality"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on X this month:

Coworkers are funny. You could see a guy every day for 5 years then he quits and you never see or even think about him again.

70 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m sorry for inventing the universe.

85 shares on WeChat this month:

But if i put my laundry away, the laundry chair will be out of a job.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

You are not in a situationship. You are texting a man who doesn’t like you.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

25 shares on Snapchat this month:

I like to establish dominance by yawning the minute someone tries to make small talk with me.

100 shares on Messenger this month:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

12 shares on Threads this month:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

29 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Just flipped my mattress, should have woken up my wife first.

44 shares on LinkedIn this month:

That thing in video games where you have a great item so you hold onto it but never end up using it? Thats me with fruit.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

When we’re old, the children will use Covid to explain our brain damaged opinions much like we do to Boomers with lead. It is fate.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m doing better than my parents at my age. They had, like, no followers.”

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Flour company: What if we sell it in a paper bag that’s not fully sealed at the bottom?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Nudes are outdated. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I know which nation I like best. Hibernation.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

We’re all mature, until someone pulls out some bubble wrap.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone wants a drunk text until I’m doing it at noon.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex is cool, but have you ever made peace with the horror of being alive.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve just learned terrible news. My department at work is planning a team-building retreat. Thank you for your thoughts during this difficult time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,920

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Do you enjoy addiction, anxiety, and urinating? Then coffee may be the beverage for you.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Awkward is the new sexy. At least that’s what I’m telling myself, so I don’t cry in front of strangers.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Hobbies include fake smiling while waiting for people to stop talking.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Some folks go to college to delay being a bum.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Bacon should be free for anyone having a bad day.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Valentine’s Day this week. If you have a crush on me we still have time to get cards and shave.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

I’m so cold, I wish I could get in the dryer.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I said yippee when you took off your pants. Do you still think I’m hot?

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I had no idea being an adult would involve so many lotions.

Trending via Telegram:

How quickly family vacations go from “Omg, we only have 4 days left” to “Omg, we still have 4 days left”

Just shared via Slack:

You can recognize working-class kids by the fact that they hang their jacket over the chair in the restaurant and not on the coat hook.

Trending via TikTok:

Don’t let anyone treat you like pond water. You are Fiji water, okay?

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes it look like you’re an angry serial killer.

Going viral on Reddit:

I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

Just shared via Reddit:

There should be a website where you post your wishes, and rich people who don’t know what to do with their money give you an anonymous gift.

Trending via Slack:

My New Years resolutions are to do some things, and stop doing some other things.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

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