Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

People singing Happy Birthday to you feels like a real-life unskippable ad.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

That moment when you realize “yeah, this person is never gonna hear from me again” is so crazy.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Having a good heart has done nothing but made me look stupid.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m now at the age where happy hour is a nap.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

When you split a dessert, the waiter should bring two forks and one of those chess clocks you smack to let the other person know it’s their turn.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Just got diagnosed with needing a hot chocolate with extra marshmallows.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

The word ‘stan’ comes from the Eminem song “Stan” which is about one of his obsessed fans. What if Eminem named the fan ‘Dennis’? We could be saying, “I dennis Beyonce.”

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

Nothing makes you regret an outfit choice faster than when you see teens looking at you and whispering.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,529

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on YouTube:

Kids be like, I see you have a moment to yourself, and I must correct that immediately.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I don’t always say something stupid. But when I do, I keep talking and make it worse.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

People used to fly kites. Glad that’s over with.

Just shared via Discord:

Not commenting on your girl’s stuff is weird. I want my man barking in my comments.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

Live now on Instagram:

If we ever make eye contact, just know I imagined way too much already.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I find it sad that my universal remote does not control the universe. Not even remotely.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

There is no actual wolf in Wolf of Wall Street.

Spotted on Facebook:

Prior to the arrival of Paper and Scissors, Rock faced no competition.

Just landed via WeChat:

Doctor: Your body has run out of magnesium. Me: OMg.

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like a nightmare study group is in session! 💤👻😱

conversation, curiosity, dream, facts, fear, fun, fun facts, humor, humor in conversation, i, know, last, nightmare, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

In honor of the fall equinox, I will also be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

0

2 months ago

autumn, change, cold, darkness, distant, equinox, fall, fall equinox, filled, honor, humor, i, seasonal, seasonal change, wit
I don’t want to stand, Apple Watch. You stand.

0

2 months ago

apple, Apple Watch, fitness, humor, i, irony, laziness, motivation, stand, technology, want, watch
I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

0

2 months ago

90s, culture, earlier, entertainment, hours, humor, i, just, kids, love, movy, nostalgia, phones, set, technology, teenager, watching, youth
The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

0

2 months ago

best, graduation, humor, kid, message, messages, parenting, school, text, text message, unsubscribe
Your pronouns should be get/help.

0

2 months ago

help, humor, identity, language, pronouns, should
I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, getting ready for work, getting some sleep for work, or thinking about not wanting to go to work.

0

2 months ago

coming, daily, daily life, getting, going, home, humor, life, procrastination, ready, routine, sleep, thinking, wanting, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on WeChat this month:

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

92 shares on WeChat this month:

I love sleeping so much that it is the first thing I think about when I wake up.

77 shares on X this month:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

28 shares on Reddit this month:

When you wish you could tell someone that won’t stop talking “Okay, we’re out of time today”, just like a therapist.

85 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I wish there were an option to turn off the Wi-Fi connection for WhatsApp only.

81 shares on Messenger this month:

You got a better chance getting chased by a dog than by me.

26 shares on Pinterest this month:

Even at my most evil, I’m considerate.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

That urge to nap between 3pm – 5pm is no joke.

58 shares on X this month:

Adult friendships are difficult. The people I get on best with never want to leave the house either.

89 shares on Slack this month:

At this point, I’m rooting for the aliens.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

I used to think adulthood was one crisis after another. I was wrong. Multiple crises. Concurrently. All at once. All the time. Forever.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

I got 3 miles in before breakfast. That’s enough driving for the day.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Having to pee really puts things into perspective. Like, OK, none of this matters.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re exercising.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

One or the other, Lord – I can’t be broke and heartbroken.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Life would be so much easier if you could push a button that makes dickheads fall through a trap door in the floor.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

I’m a credit card, cause I’m always being used or denied.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Coffee should be free for everyone Monday through Friday.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Tell me I’d look good in a potato sack or lose me forever.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’m eating for two; me and the person I strive to be.

Freshly posted on Discord:

It probably feels so good to ram your head into something as a cat.

Trending via Snapchat:

In every imagination I have pictured myself in, I’m never poor.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.

Just shared via Instagram:

Damn, didn’t win the lottery. It’s messing up my budget plan.

Spreading quickly via X:

Everyone you know is fighting battles you don’t know about, except for my neighbor who just can not shut up about his battles.

Trending via Telegram:

The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

Making waves on TikTok:

Any place is a walkable city if you’re broke enough.

Just shared via WeChat:

I’m so lucky people can’t hear what I’m thinking.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

In honor of the fall equinox, I will also be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

I don’t want to stand, Apple Watch. You stand.

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

The best part of my kid graduating was unsubscribing from the school’s text messages.

Your pronouns should be get/help.

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, getting ready for work, getting some sleep for work, or thinking about not wanting to go to work.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨