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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Welcome to Twitter, someone from an unhappy home will attend to you shortly.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

How do I get recruited by a cult? I need some direction in my life.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Looks fade but dark, twisted, inappropriate humor is forever.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

The only thing I miss all day is my bed.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Screw you guys, I’m gonna go make friends with the crows.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

I saw The Blair Witch Project way too young and it made me afraid of projects.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

494 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,087

Funny Quotes Topics

17,241

Funny Quotes Images

15,087

Updated

Dec 19, 2025

Users Online

3,736

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Telegram:

Unfortunately, free coffee in the office will never hit like a $9 iced latte will.

Trending via YouTube:

Our house is so messy that if we ever disappeared, the police would have no idea if there were “signs of a struggle”.

Just shared via X:

Your annoying online persona has captured my heart.

Live now on Instagram:

A penguin is a bird the way a hot dog is a sandwich.

Going viral on YouTube:

I want a man who doesn’t annoy me while I’m constantly getting on his nerves. It can’t be that difficult.

Making waves on Threads:

I’m currently trying not to read anything about carbohydrates after 4pm.

Seen just now on Slack:

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

2 months ago

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Commentary:
Sounds like Prince Charming needs a software update 😂👑💔

dating, disappointment, expectation, finding, guy, humor, just, loser, lust, personality, reality, relationship, sweet, sweet guy, thing, worst

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

1 month ago

am, awake, difficult, difficult time, humor, i, personal, personal space, please, privacy, respect, sarcasm, sleep, space, time
I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

2 months ago

humor, joking, just, mean, people, perception, personality, sarcasm, think
Y’all liking my posts feels like a little forehead kiss.

1 month ago

affection, compliment, forehead, forehead kiss, humor, kiss, liking, little, media, post, posts, social, social media
Damn, how much daylight are they trying to save? It’s dark as hell.

2 months ago

change, complaint, dark, daylight, daylight saving, hell, humor, much, sarcasm, save, saving, time, time change, trying
So apparently it’s still a DUI even if you’re the birthday boy.

1 month ago

birthday, boy, celebration, consequences, drinking, DUI, even, humor, irony, party, still
I will be posting telepathically on all social media today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.

2 months ago

communication, humor, i, joke, me, media, mind, mind reading, posting, reading, social, social media, telepathy, think, today

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

If the USA is so great, why did someone make the USB?

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Before I agree to the new year, I wanna read the terms and conditions.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Forget all this adulting stuff, let’s bring back Saturday morning cartoons.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

I think my boss is delusional; he keeps shaking his head and calls me Jesus Christ.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Brother: What are you bringing to Thanksgiving dinner? Me: Wine and unresolved issues. They pair nicely.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Bad news. Right now is as young as you’re going to be.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

I am MTV, still played music videos, years old.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

Thank you for being friends with me. Baffling decision, but thank you.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

A couple of years ago, the internet was an escape from the real world. Today, the real world is an escape from the internet.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’m not fat. I’m just easy to see.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? Here, but fatter.

Going viral on Pinterest:

The difference between a biography and an autobiography is self-explanatory.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

I’m the friend who shows up with a shovel and an alibi.

Freshly posted on Threads:

It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

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Activity Log ✨

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

Damn, how much daylight are they trying to save? It’s dark as hell.

So apparently it’s still a DUI even if you’re the birthday boy.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I only see psychics so that I can keep arguing with dead relatives.

Not to brag, but I finished an entire book in one sitting. I’m going to need some new crayons.

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

What are some beginner bad habits for someone just getting into ruining their life?

My spirit animal is that one bird that knocks itself unconscious, flying into windows.

When I said there’s no such thing as a dumb question, I didn’t expect them to take it as a personal challenge.

Watering plants qualifies as a hobby.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Can I come over and circle you like a vulture?

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re exercising.

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

But he was so nice on the prison phone calls.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

Autumn at last. Sitting on the sofa all day with a blanket and tea and watching movies. Just like in summer, but with a blanket and tea.

I always feel sleepy, except when I want to sleep.

My brain at 2 a.m.: “You up?”

Why are these idiots only giving robots two arms?

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The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

Y’all liking my posts feels like a little forehead kiss.

Damn, how much daylight are they trying to save? It’s dark as hell.

So apparently it’s still a DUI even if you’re the birthday boy.

I will be posting telepathically on all social media today. So if you think of something funny, that was me.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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