Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Google Maps should not count towards my screen time. I’m not addicted to my phone, I’m disoriented.
  • I hate Valentine’s Day but I do enjoy infant archery.
  • How dare my boss set up a meeting for the time I sneak off early?
  • I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.
  • Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can’t eat or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.
  • In case you wanna quit vaping, I’d suggest using a harmonica.