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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Nothing humbles you faster than your phone slipping out of your hand and hitting your face.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about yourself. You can do that on your own.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

My husband needs a hearing aid, but refuses to get one because it’s the key to our happy marriage.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

Worrying is just worshipping the problem.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Everything is about sex except Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is about power.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

It’s interesting growing up and learning that most adults are not smart. I had my suspicions as a kid, but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

JFK is the perfect name for this airport because it’s a bloody headache.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

235 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,504

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,504

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,307

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

I’m not “dating to marry” or “dating for fun.” I’m dating for a secret third reason.

Live now on TikTok:

If “live each day as if it’s your last” means being paralyzed with anxiety and a sense of impending doom, then I am absolutely nailing it.

Going viral on Discord:

US etiquette question: Do you need to tip the guy at the border who reads your last five years of social media history?

Making waves on TikTok:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Remember, you don’t have to worry about being around annoying people in public if you never leave the house.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

Seen just now on Slack:

The only team building exercise we had when I started working was called “Happy Hour.”

Breaking via Reddit:

I’m soirée for my mispronunciation of French words.

Just shared via Slack:

Pugs look like regular dogs that ran into a door at full speed.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Everything is 10 times funnier when you are supposed to be quiet.

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Guess I'm 99% water and 1% Barbie! 💧🎀 #PlasticFantastic"

Barbie, culture, environmentalism, got, humor, irony, little, microplastic, microplastics, pop, pop culture, self-reflection, us

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Bugs Bunny was my introduction to opera. Can’t say I’ve kept up with it much since.

0

4 months ago

bugs, Bugs Bunny, bunny, cartoon, entertainment, humor, introduction, much, music, opera, say
Your nose is in the middle of your face because it is the scenter.

0

2 months ago

face, humor, joke, middle, nose, pun, scenter, wordplay
An evil genius rising to a position of power is bad but it makes sense at least. Feels insulting we’re constantly seeing evil idiots doing it instead.

0

2 months ago

bad, doing, evil, evil genius, evil idiot, genius, idiot, idiots, insulting, least, position, power, rising, seeing, sense
There will never be a perfect time. Make that mistake now.

0

2 months ago

action, advice, humor, life, life advice, mistake, never, opportunity, perfect, perfection, time
If A-B-C-D didn’t take their sweet time in the alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn’t have to sprint every time.

0

2 months ago

alphabet, every, humor, letter, music, pace, song, sprint, sweet, take, time, timing
This pillow isn’t going to scream into itself.

0

2 months ago

comfort, expression, going, humor, pillow, relatable, scream, sleep

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Messenger this month:

Sure, you can invite more people to the plans we made 2 months ago. The more, the merrier. Also, I’m not going now.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

“Normalize this, normalize that.” How about y’all feel shame for once?

46 shares on WhatsApp this month:

There are two wolves inside me, but please no one tell my landlord.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

This meeting could have been a pajama party.

24 shares on Reddit this month:

Every Sunday is superbowel if you eat enough chili.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

39 shares on Snapchat this month:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

29 shares on Instagram this month:

You should be allowed to go home early from work if you miss your dog a lot.

22 shares on Instagram this month:

Stop giving kids Bible names but no Bible lessons. Moses tried to rob me last night.

41 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My fantasy is having two men at once. One cooking, one cleaning.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Please don’t invite me over if you have a leather chair that’s already peeling. I will peel it some more when you’re not looking.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Teens are like, “My homework isn’t done, but check out this presentation I made on why I need Instagram.”

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

Life is so funny because you think you look good today and a year later you look even better.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

My transformation into a bitter, angry old woman is almost complete.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

3 friends is enough. 1 for the movie theater, 1 for drinks and apps, 1 for texting concerning mental health information.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

“Is everything okay?” Bro, nothing has been since I turned 12.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Polar lights: when the sky forgets it’s supposed to be boring.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

One interesting thing I learned in my thirties is that you can leave a bar before it closes.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

Making waves on X:

You’re a “haha” girl, and I’m an “lol” guy. It just wouldn’t work.

Just shared via Reddit:

The end of Twitter is taking forever. Did Tolkien write this?

Going viral on Twitch:

Sometimes I have to turn off the news and put on a true crime documentary, so I can relax.

Making waves on Twitch:

I’m always best at the things I shouldn’t do.

Going viral on Threads:

Damn boy, are you a horoscope? Because I’m selectively focusing on the parts of you that make sense for me.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Checked myself, but unfortunately, after I wrecked myself.

Breaking via Discord:

I just want a bar where I can pour my own drink, have music at a normal volume, and there are no people, and it’s my house.

Broadcasted on Threads:

What a time to be alive, it’s like the collapse of Rome, but with memes.

Going bananas on Reddit:

“Do you like using Twitter?” Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Bugs Bunny was my introduction to opera. Can’t say I’ve kept up with it much since.

Your nose is in the middle of your face because it is the scenter.

An evil genius rising to a position of power is bad but it makes sense at least. Feels insulting we’re constantly seeing evil idiots doing it instead.

There will never be a perfect time. Make that mistake now.

If A-B-C-D didn’t take their sweet time in the alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn’t have to sprint every time.

This pillow isn’t going to scream into itself.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨