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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Take me down to the Moria city, where the girls are green and the boys are stinky… and even Gandalf said ‘Nope, too freaky!’

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

I need a job where I don’t actually have to work.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Due to foreseen circumstances well within my control I will be late.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

You know those couples who share their food? I mean, what kind of people are they? Aren’t they hungry?

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

I think I just hit a Labubu with my car.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

My dentist said my teeth were stained and asked if I smoke or drink coffee? I said, “I drink it.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

430 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,699

Funny Quotes Topics

17,717

Funny Quotes Images

15,699

Updated

Jan 13, 2026

Users Online

3,627

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

Going viral on Slack:

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

Live now on YouTube:

Confuse a restaurant manager today by telling her how good the service was.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Sorry I slowed down but I had to calculate if the bridge could hold the weight of my car with all the stuffed animals my kids insisted on bringing on vacation.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Nothing I do for money is passion-based. It’s just pure hatred for being broke.

Shared recently on YouTube:

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

Just shared via Slack:

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.

Going viral on Messenger:

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever watched the teams you hate be first-round exits?

Seen just now on WeChat:

Imagine you’re on jury duty and the courtroom sketch artist draws stink lines above you.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Why will Satan torture people in hell for disobeying the same God he disobeyed?

1 day ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like Satan's running one very confusing employee training program down there! 🔥😈🙃

disobedience, faith, God, hell, humor, irony, people, question, religion, same, Satan, torture, why

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

According to my skin, hair, lips, and hands, I am doing Dry January.

2 days ago

alcohol-free, am, doing, dry, Dry January, hair, hand, hands, humor, i, January, lip, lips, self-care, skin
If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

6 months ago

attitude, back, demon, ever, humor, ID, just, me, possessed, possession, problem, sarcasm, say, sit, wit
There’s poetry in walking away without closing the door too loud.

6 months ago

away, closing, door, exit, humor, loud, noise, poetry, sound, subtlety, too, walking, walking away
‘You’re going to die alone!’ Okay, when did dying become a group project?

2 months ago

alone, die, dying, existential, going, group, humor, life, okay, project
The trick is to be born in the right place and at the right time. If you mess that up, it gets tedious.

2 months ago

born, mess, place, right, right place, right time, tedious, time, trick
I suck at flirting. I’ll be like “is that so?”

2 months ago

awkwardness, conversation, date, flirting, humor, i, relationship, skills, social, social skills, suck

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on TikTok this month:

Some people’s laughs are funnier than the joke.

88 shares on YouTube this month:

Gambling is all about getting something for nothing and spending thousands of dollars trying to do it.

81 shares on Pinterest this month:

It’s like ten thousand tweets when all you need is a life.

49 shares on WhatsApp this month:

(guy who’s not even that into you) I love you.

87 shares on Discord this month:

The human brain is great. It works from the second you are born and stops as soon as you start liking someone.

81 shares on TikTok this month:

Broke my work phone. I can’t talk on it anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.

21 shares on Messenger this month:

Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

39 shares on YouTube this month:

Future generations will never have to live in unprecedented times, because we’re precedenting the Hell out of everything right now.

21 shares on Twitch this month:

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

26 shares on YouTube this month:

Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

You will meet a girl who is very strange and a little bit evil. It’s really important that you don’t lose me.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

My phone is like my lover, it’s the last thing I see at night, and the first thing I wake up to every morning.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

It took me 5 minutes to do something I’ve been stressing about for 6 months. I will learn nothing from this.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Does anyone else run a used match under water before disposing of it because you’re afraid it still has some fire left in it, or are you normal?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

If you need ChatGPT to write an email, maybe you shouldn’t have job.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

By the time I remember to text back, it be too disrespectful to even do it.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

One day I’ll do amazing things. Today I’ll be satisfied if I don’t spill food on my lap.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Today’s kids don’t even get chicken pox anymore, they go straight to STDs.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WeChat:

The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.

Breaking via TikTok:

Having to write cover letters is so dumb. Do you really believe my dream ever since I was a little girl was to work for you? No. It was to ride a pony on a funky space rainbow. Grow up.

Seen just now on Slack:

It really cannot be overstated how many of your problems disappear once you have a beautiful woman who is in love with you.

Breaking via X:

Driving behind a salt truck on a snowy day is a Midwest police escort.

Seen just now on Reddit:

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

Trending via YouTube:

I never finish what I start. I have a black belt in partial arts.

Just shared via Slack:

I’m a red flag, but the material is quality.

Just shared via Telegram:

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

Going viral on Slack:

Nothing really prepares you for when your favorite sweatpants begin to fall apart.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Why will Satan torture people in hell for disobeying the same God he disobeyed?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

According to my skin, hair, lips, and hands, I am doing Dry January.

If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

There’s poetry in walking away without closing the door too loud.

‘You’re going to die alone!’ Okay, when did dying become a group project?

The trick is to be born in the right place and at the right time. If you mess that up, it gets tedious.

I suck at flirting. I’ll be like “is that so?”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨