Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

If you can’t handle me at my weirdest, then leave, because it gets weirder.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

I was actually doing so well until your email found me.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

I’m beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on the bus do not go round and round.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

The worst part about waking up is all the remembering.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

Extrovert self made too many plans and now introvert self is pissed.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

The audacity of someone being in the store aisle I want to go down.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

My wife is refusing to bring me a beer. That’s it, gonna text her and say “I cannot believe how lazy you are”.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Dear God, thank you for the job I have. But if you have a lottery win planned for me, I’m ready! Thank you.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Can’t. Just put my hair in a bun and that’s just about enough exercise for today.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I’m sorry I mistook all our laughs, long nights, sweet texts, and inside jokes as you caring. I’ll think twice before wasting my time again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,532

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

Why does it take 5-7 days to refund me when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out?

Spotted on Twitch:

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

One thing about me is I don’t even need to get drunk to act a fool.

Just landed via Instagram:

Flying bugs can basically go anywhere they want, but still choose to fly right into your face.

Just shared via TikTok:

If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Shared recently on Slack:

In high school I was voted “most likely to hold a grudge” and I’m still mad about it.

Going viral on Threads:

First time buying fireworks, and I wasn’t sure I’d picked the right ones until the salesman gave me a wink and high-foured me.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Next time I feel butterflies, I’m chugging down a bottle of tequila so they drown.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

Absolutely destroyed my bed last night… I cuddled those covers so hard.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Guess your comforter never stood a chance! #CuddleKing/Queen 🛏️🐻💥"

absolutely, bed, bedtime, comfort, cover, cuddle, exaggeration, hard, humor, i, last, night, sleep

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

0

3 months ago

activity, favorite, favorite activity, humor, laziness, mattress, relaxation, sleep
I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

0

2 months ago

AirTag, health, humor, i, mental, mental health, put, sanity, technology, tracking, wish
Reminder that you need to be scrolling all day to monitor the situation.

0

3 months ago

daily, daily routine, day, distraction, humor, media, monitor, need, reminder, routine, scrolling, situation, social, social media
So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

0

2 months ago

across, adult, adult behavior, baby, behavior, bottle, crawling, cute, floor, funny observation, humor, i, intervention, need, observation
Welcome to your senior years, where you get mad when they rearrange the grocery store.

0

2 months ago

aging, frustration, grocery, grocery store, humor, mad, rearrange, senior, senior year, store, welcome, where, year
If you’re a man and don’t feel well or are going through something tough, just remember no one cares.

0

2 weeks ago

feel, feeling, feeling unwell, going, humor, indifference, just, love, man, remember, something, through, time, tough, tough love, tough time, unwell, well

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Slack this month:

Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

51 shares on X this month:

I am such a fun person and so easy to get along with as long as the layout I have secretly imagined for the entire day goes exactly as I planned it without variation or interruption.

48 shares on Discord this month:

Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

40 shares on TikTok this month:

Unfollowing high school people really is a form of self-care.

15 shares on Facebook this month:

Every time I ask my husband to bring me something out of my purse, without a doubt, he’ll bring me my whole purse. Why are purses so scary to men, lol.

20 shares on Threads this month:

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

16 shares on Discord this month:

That odd feeling when your lunch break is over and you still have to work for another 30 years.

28 shares on Messenger this month:

Not the sharpest cheddar on the charcuterie board.

43 shares on Messenger this month:

Rent really don’t make no sense. Like, why is my apartment getting a raise every year? Who is doing the performance review?

57 shares on Twitch this month:

I like to think of myself as an onion. Peel back the many layers and deep down inside you’ll find a smaller, more anxious onion.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Please pray for our son, who had to unload the dishwasher when “he just did this yesterday, and he’s tired.”

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I’m full of rage, but in a very chill and nonchalant way.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

God doesn’t do nearly enough smiting anymore.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

I’m writing a book on the joys of drinking beer. So far I’ve been through a lot of drafts.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Sometimes I think I’m too old to make a career change. But then I remember how Walter White went from high school teacher to drug kingpin. Anything is possible!

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

If you feel fat and sad just know it’s someone out there fatter than you.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

“Normalize this, normalize that.” How about y’all feel shame for once?

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Telegram:

You can make a salad without lettuce if you want, there are no rules.

Just shared via X:

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

Shared recently on Twitch:

He died doing what he did best, trying to get a croc to wear a Croc.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I bet my soulmate is out there somewhere pretending everything is fine.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I love you to the refrigerator and back.

Just landed via Reddit:

Oh no, we don’t go in there. That room belongs to the spiders.

Just shared via Instagram:

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?

Trending via Instagram:

I hate when I’m trying to spell a word, and my phone can’t do it either.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Absolutely destroyed my bed last night… I cuddled those covers so hard.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

Reminder that you need to be scrolling all day to monitor the situation.

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Welcome to your senior years, where you get mad when they rearrange the grocery store.

If you’re a man and don’t feel well or are going through something tough, just remember no one cares.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨