Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Spilled my drink? 'But it's summer! 😅🍹' Lost an argument? 'But it's summer! 🤷‍♂️☀️' Tripped over my own feet? You guessed it… 'But it's summer! 🕶️👟'"

carefree, end, everything, excuse, going, heat, humor, joke, procrastination, season, seasonal, summer

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

0

2 months ago

better, humor, i, making, me, resolution, Resolutions, self-improvement, think, time, year’s
I don’t understand, but I also don’t care… so it works out.

0

2 months ago

apathy, attitude, care, confusion, humor, i, life, life attitude, understand, works
Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

0

2 months ago

always, arguing, black, black sheep, corner, culture, digital, digital culture, humor, internet, media, online, online platform, platform, satire, self-argument, sheep, social, social media, tech, tech humor, Twitter, web
Don’t worry, bro. She’s probably just working on a puzzle right now. She’ll get back to you.

0

2 months ago

back, bro, casual, communication, humor, just, patience, playful, puzzle, reassurance, relationship, right, shell, working, worry
I met my wife at a singles night. I was surprised as I thought she was at home with the kids.

0

2 months ago

activity, dating, fun, fun activity, home, i, kids, marriage, night, relationship, singles, singles night, surprise, thought, wife
I’m trying to shower you with affection. It doesn’t matter how I got into your bathroom.

0

2 months ago

affection, awkward, awkward situation, bathroom, humor, i, love, matter, relationship, shower, situation, surprise, trying

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on Threads this month:

What idiot called it Catfishing your Tinder Contacts and not Playing With Matches?

69 shares on Pinterest this month:

I got a lot of Jedi advice for somebody who could be turned to the dark side by moderate traffic.

11 shares on WeChat this month:

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

80 shares on Reddit this month:

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

17 shares on Telegram this month:

Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money.

65 shares on Telegram this month:

Yes officer, I’d like to file a restraining order against my dentist’s appointment reminder system.

31 shares on X this month:

I wonder how many calories I can burn petting my cat.

29 shares on YouTube this month:

Life is short. Make sure you spend as much time as possible on the web arguing with strangers.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

Letting my wife sleep in a little longer for Mother’s Day before we wake her up and ask what’s for breakfast.

36 shares on Threads this month:

If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Mental state: just googled “When will the sun explode.”

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

You only realize how heavy your handbag really is when your car tells you that your passenger is not wearing a seatbelt.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

I can relate to the stock market because I am always about to crash at a moment’s notice.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Tried counting sheep, but now I’m emotionally invested in their backstories and I think one might need therapy.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

Anything is an appetizer if you eat more food after.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Post beach shower is undefeated. Greatest feeling a human could experience. Throw a nap in there, and you will never touch serenity so close.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

I don’t hate you, I just don’t want to see you alive.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

At my next therapy session, I will be discussing the trauma I’ve been dealing with ever since the grocery store layout was altered.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Beer is like the color black: it goes with everything.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

DUI stands for: don’t Uber, I got this.

Just shared via TikTok:

Songs discovered from movies are usually a masterpiece.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Twitter can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.

Trending via TikTok:

The way I see it, eating chips while I wait for my pizza to arrive is no different than ordering a starter in a restaurant.

Breaking via Messenger:

You can be having the nicest day and then you have to print something and you know your day is about to fall apart real fast.

Making waves on Messenger:

Don’t wait for later to eat the cake. Do it now, before another mammal of your household finds it.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I don’t need a recipe for disaster. I usually just eyeball it.

Going viral on Reddit:

They should build a separate grocery store for people who have actually purchased food before, know how to push a cart, and possess at least an ounce of spatial awareness.

Shared recently on Threads:

Can anyone recommend some good places for somebody just getting into visiting?

Going bananas on Instagram:

I realized being an adult is just feeling too tired to function, and then functioning.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“But it’s summer,” is going to be my excuse for everything from now until the end of September.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

I don’t understand, but I also don’t care… so it works out.

Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

Don’t worry, bro. She’s probably just working on a puzzle right now. She’ll get back to you.

I met my wife at a singles night. I was surprised as I thought she was at home with the kids.

I’m trying to shower you with affection. It doesn’t matter how I got into your bathroom.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨