Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

One or the other, Lord – I can’t be broke and heartbroken.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I really love playing chess with elderly people in the park, but it’s just really hard to find thirty-two of them willing to do it.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

Nothing guarantees running into someone you know in public better than looking like a feral animal on two hours of sleep.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

I don’t have a favourite person, but I do have a favourite cheese.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

A funny thing about the Heimlich Maneuver is that it’s impossible to pronounce if you’re choking.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

One of the most amazing things in nature is that the basketball hoop is the perfect size to fit a basketball through.