Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m an adult, that’s why I can have Skittles for dinner.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

I get it, drug commercials. I too like to dance while I describe all my side effects.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

The devil couldn’t reach me, so he made sure that the love I give is never reciprocated.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

If I ever find out who stole my identity, I’ll pay all their debts and ruin their credit score just for fun.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

That place is so crowded; nobody goes there anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

The horror of being warned that the person you’re about to meet is “fine once you get to know them”.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Mister Sandman, bring me a meme. Make it the dumbest shit that I’ve ever seen.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,912

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Men will ask you zero questions about yourself, and then say they never met anybody like you.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

There are rumors that someone came down the chimney last night. This is preposterous. I would have lost my mind.

Going viral on Discord:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Seen just now on Threads:

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Do people with lip filler know that they look like that?

Spotted on Twitch:

Sometimes you just need a Saturday to sleep all day and do absolutely nothing.

Making waves on X:

I will sit in the rain about this.

Going viral on Twitch:

Meeting Beyoncé and telling her I loved her in Goldmember and mentioning nothing about her music career, just to see if it throws her off.

Going viral on X:

I just refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good to watch.

Everyone is fighting a battle you don’t know about, except for me. I am complaining loudly about my battle. Everybody knows about it.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like you're the world champion of TMI: Too Much Information! 🤣🎙️ #BattleBroadcast

am, attention, battle, complaining, complaint, everyone, except, fighting, honesty, humor, i, know, knows, loud, me, struggle, transparency

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

How do I tell someone respectfully to die in a fire?

0

2 months ago

communication, conflict, die, fire, humor, i, irony, respect, sarcasm, someone, tell
Vacations are expensive, but how else could you put a price tag on your kids being ungrateful in a different city.

0

5 months ago

being, city, different, else, expense, expensive, family, humor, kid, kids, parenting, price, price tag, put, tag, travel, ungrateful, vacation
And is the financial stability in the room with us right now?

0

2 months ago

awkward, awkward situation, conversation, financial, financial stability, humor, joke, money, right, room, situation, stability, us
The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

0

3 months ago

celebration, effect, humor, kiss, life, play, real, real life, romance, should, sitcom, someone, sound, sound effect, track, whenever
Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

0

2 months ago

connection, contact, distraction, essential, eye, eye contact, finding, humor, meetings, person, strategy, stupid, survival, workplace
Going to look at the small picture for a while. Tired of seeing the big picture. Too much picture.

0

2 months ago

big, big picture, focus, going, humor, much, perspective, picture, seeing, simplicity, small, small picture, tired, too, too much

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

61 shares on Slack this month:

Worst feeling in the world is when you are loyal to all your girlfriends but your favorite one is cheating on you.

58 shares on Facebook this month:

That stupid look on my face is my face.

27 shares on Twitch this month:

Hear me out, a Q-Tip that doesn’t bounce out the trash can when you throw it away.

62 shares on Threads this month:

Recovering people pleasers will be like, “I’m in my villain era!” and it’s just politely drawing healthy boundaries.

89 shares on Reddit this month:

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

Ok, new plan, I’m gonna marry a Kardashian.

36 shares on Instagram this month:

Waking up early is always beneficial. You just gotta make it past those first 10 minutes of being irritated.

65 shares on Slack this month:

Might mess around and reply to all work emails with “make me”.

81 shares on Reddit this month:

Sleep is a beautiful thing. You don’t miss anyone, you can’t do anything wrong and you simply feel nothing.

53 shares on Snapchat this month:

Crazy that caffeine has no short or long-term negative side effects. Just a super drug from God.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Our parents used to drop us off at school with no water bottle, no phone and no snacks, yet somehow we survived.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

If cats could text you back, they wouldn’t.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

If it doesn’t get a like in the first two years, I delete it.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

Kids these days don’t know the shame of having to explain yo-yo injuries.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

Witnessing karma is awesome . . . witnessing instant karma is more awesome.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

I don’t need a fancy watch to tell me I’m not fit one bit.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

My problem is I buy outfits I don’t have shoes for and shoes I don’t have outfits for.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Why is there a level 6 for toasters? As if someone thinks: “Tonight I’m really in the mood for ashes with butter!”

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

Thinking about taking some time off to focus on cheese.

Breaking via Facebook:

I didn’t expect to have such strong feelings when the subtitles said “smooching” while the actors were kissing.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Sorry for levitating at the end of your bed all night, I just think you’re really cute.

Spotted on Discord:

There are people who have a favourite colour, and there are people whose favourite colour is purple. These are very different things. Purple fans are different creatures.

Spotted on Twitch:

Just found out my 84-year-old neighbour is on his own tomorrow, so I’ve just been over to collect his spare chairs to borrow.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I be like, “I needed this,” and it’s just me getting drunk.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

A bad relationship can ruin a good song.

Just shared via Telegram:

I waste a lot of time putting my phone down to just pick it back up again.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I can’t wait to go to bed, get terrible sleep, and wake up exhausted with a sore back.

Spotted on Pinterest:

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everyone is fighting a battle you don’t know about, except for me. I am complaining loudly about my battle. Everybody knows about it.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

How do I tell someone respectfully to die in a fire?

Vacations are expensive, but how else could you put a price tag on your kids being ungrateful in a different city.

And is the financial stability in the room with us right now?

The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Going to look at the small picture for a while. Tired of seeing the big picture. Too much picture.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨