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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Maybe Baby wants to be put in the corner.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Two people had sex and now I’m fighting for my life everyday.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Saying “sounds good to me” in a meeting then quickly realizing a lot more was expected from you.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

If I ever find out who stole my identity, I’ll pay all their debts and ruin their credit score just for fun.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

A haunted house, but every room is just learning more about Will & Jada.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

People who read and do research will always sound crazy to people who don’t.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

Remember when tweets were like: party rocking with a mouse tonight. Piece of cheese gonna have a big bite.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,587

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

Thursday is really unnecessary. Today could’ve been Friday.

Going viral on Reddit:

Googled my symptoms and it turns out it’s just the politics.

Going viral on WeChat:

Sunday is proof that time travel exists, because it was just Friday.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’ve been in a bad mood since like 2010.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Asking him what his favorite dinosaur is on the first date to determine compatibility.

Going viral on Messenger:

I see you liked my selfie, but what about my ideas?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I want to be like a caterpillar. Eat a lot, sleep for a while, and then wake up beautiful.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

Just landed via Facebook:

Very difficult being a full grown adult with a terrible fear of being “in trouble”.

Going viral on Threads:

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

Funny Alan Rickman quotes

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New funny Alan Rickman quotes 👇

All funny Alan Rickman quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Telegram this month:

Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.

76 shares on Slack this month:

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

24 shares on Discord this month:

Aliens will always remain unidentified because they’re embarrassed to be associated with us humans.

77 shares on Instagram this month:

I really can’t wait until it all works out.

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

87 shares on Threads this month:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

ChatGPT is down right now and if you listen closely, you can hear millions of content creators screaming.

56 shares on YouTube this month:

I love posting my thoughts on the internet. Now they’re your problem.

99 shares on Twitch this month:

Chores give kids a sense of responsibility while teaching relevant life skills such as procrastination.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

I got bills. They’re multiplying.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

7 folks are currently checking 👀

If I shook my head at every stupid thing I saw, I’d have permanent whiplash.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve come to the conclusion that my guardian angel is very possessive about me.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Me leaving the house: I hope I don’t see anyone.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

All I want is to live well and to die in a manner so bizarre and gruesome it can only be described with a German word.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My body is a machine that turns pizza into diarrhea.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I have a drawer in my kitchen that I can’t open anymore because of that one time I decided to put a spatula in it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,228

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise, and then I assume that they are lying to make fun of me.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it!

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

I’m not an idiot anymore, universe, please stop with the lessons.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Isn’t it beautiful how ‘Bruh’ has stood the test of time all these years.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

I just ate, and now I’m going swimming, so I guess this is goodbye.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

I need to have a ginger ale about this.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Living your life to the fullest does not have to involve selfies with bison.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Twitter is great because you can tweet “hi” and someone will tell you you’re wrong.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

If anything I post makes you mad, just know that it pleases me.

Just shared via Discord:

Yes, officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn’t see your car.

Shared recently on Twitch:

According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

Going viral on Discord:

Accept the truth that a clean kitchen and finished laundry are just myths. Embrace the chaos and find your inner calm.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Whoever first said, “It gets to a point,” was definitely at that point, and I feel them deeply.

Making waves on Pinterest:

“It’s been a long week!” Me, on a Tuesday.

Going viral on Reddit:

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

Shared recently on Facebook:

I travel like I’m rich, then eat like I’m broke.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Never forget that your fave celebs were trying to sell you cartoon monkey pictures during a pandemic.

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