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Jan 20, 2025
Share →: Could you set a lightsaber on low and use it as a back scratcher?

Commentary:
🤔💡 "Asking the real questions here! Who needs a regular old back scratcher when you have a lightsaber, right? 💫✨ Just be sure to keep it on low setting unless you want to accidentally turn your back into a Jedi training ground. May the force of relaxation be with you! 🚀🌟"

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Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

A gender-neutral equivalent of ‘sugar daddy’ is glucose guardian.

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Foo fighters still fighting foo.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

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I was gonna get on the treadmill, but then the couch will get sad.

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Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

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Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

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Imagine hating on me and I’m just sitting there in the corner, in the spotlight, losing my religion.

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Vaping always looked dumb. It looks like you’re smoking a kazoo, and now the lead poisoning is the cherry on top.

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Guy inventing jogging: how can I suffer, but with music?

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If you have nothing nice to say, I promise you that I’ll have something even worse to say back.

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Reported on Facebook:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

Just landed via Telegram:

It’s funny how our brains remember that we have forgotten something, but not what we have forgotten.

Shared recently on Slack:

Hot wings have killed many people starting with a dude named Icarus.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

You miss 100% of the gossip from the phone calls you don’t answer.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Lounging under the stars is top-tier therapy.

Going viral on YouTube:

I exaggerated on my job application and said I wanted to work for a living.

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I wonder how my close personal beloved friend Taylor Swift is doing today.

Making waves on Instagram:

A good relationship is when she is by your side during bad times to tell you that none of this would have happened if you had just listened to her.

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The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

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Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My nephew asks so many questions that Alexa just told him it’s okay to bathe with the toaster.

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

ChatGPT is down right now and if you listen closely, you can hear millions of content creators screaming.

Embattled politicians resign saying they want to spend more time with their families. Do their families get a say in this?

I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

You gotta separate the art from the artist. Like, for example, sometimes the artist is really nice but their art sucks.

I hope your day is as nice as my ass.

If you start a sentence with “Let me reiterate…”, I’m gonna ignore it the second time too.

Sucking melted cheese off the burger wrapper as God intended.

I think my wife has got early Alzheimer’s. Every day she tells me that she has no idea what she first saw in me.

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It’s okay to get rid of the boxes for the electronic things you’ve had for the past couple of years.

If pills are too toxic to flush down the toilet, you probably shouldn’t swallow them.

That one unemployed roommate who gets a package every day.

Our dog snores so loud, we had to rename him Grandpa.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it or not.

When you’re a child, you want to be a teenager. When you’re a teenager, you want to be an adult. When you’re an adult, you want to be a cat.

I wish I had the confidence of someone who would let themselves be tattooed in a place they can’t see.

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

Make every hug more interesting by mysteriously whispering, “the Dark Lord stands at the crossroads!”

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