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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

If I were a billionaire, I wouldn’t build rockets to escape to Mars. I would build rockets to make everyone else leave Earth.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

I’m so jealous of people who know how to shut up. I shut up, and subtitles come out my face.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

When you thought something would be easy peasy lemon squeezy, but it’s actually been stressy, depressy, lemon zesty.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

There’s never a good place to clip your toenails at the library.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Them: Money doesn’t bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

I would do absolutely anything to get 8 hours of sleep, except for going to bed 8 hours before I need to wake up.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

I thought the noise my husband’s stomach was making was never going to end last night until I realized it was a motorbike outside.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

I’m gonna get my vasectomy done at Home Depot like a real man.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,250

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

Getting to the age where I’m like, “Oh, hopefully I’ll be dead by then.”

Making waves on Twitch:

After a vacation, I usually return to work with a fresh, reenergized hatred for my job.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Work beers should be a daily thing.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Adulting is when you realize that all you need is a home, stable income and a peaceful partner.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode them bikes when we were younger.

Just landed via WeChat:

I generally don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but I’m really good at it.

Just landed via Facebook:

For Thanksgiving don’t ask me about my life, just pass me the bottle.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Being Leonardo DiCaprio is like driving in a school zone. You don’t go above twenty-five.

Going viral on Slack:

Oh good. Another day.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Songs discovered from movies are usually a masterpiece.

Funny bureaucracy quotes

Funny bureaucracy quotes bring a hilarious twist to the endless piles of paperwork and red tape 🗂️😂. Whether you’ve ever battled endless forms or sat through never-ending meetings, these witty lines perfectly capture the absurdity of office life 🏢✍️. Get ready to laugh at the quirks of rules, regulations, and the infamous wait times ⏳🤣—because sometimes, humor is the best way to survive bureaucracy! 🎉📋

New funny bureaucracy quotes 👇

All funny bureaucracy quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sometimes I tell myself I should stop drinking so much, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who’s talking to himself.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

Can’t, too busy deleting screenshots of my lock screen.

81 shares on Slack this month:

The most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower.

25 shares on TikTok this month:

Washing machine minutes are not the same as regular minutes.

82 shares on Twitch this month:

One of the most embarrassing things in the world: walking downhill.

49 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Halloween pumpkins look even scarier if you just use the ones from last year.

89 shares on TikTok this month:

Women don’t apologize. They sleep naked and let you decide whether you are still angry or not.

19 shares on YouTube this month:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

47 shares on Pinterest this month:

To whoever stole my oversized clock, you owe me big time.

16 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Traumatized people will navigate emergency situations with calm surety but then have an anxiety attack in a grocery store.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the “for myself” is silent.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Films and television have led me to believe that masquerade balls have a higher mortality rate than most wars.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Since there is only one of me, does that make me limited edition?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I didn’t go to the Carribean, my tan is from standing in front of the rotisserie chicken at Costco.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

You ever been in the middle of a conversation and realized this is why you avoid people?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Napping is the best activity for weight loss, because I can’t eat anything when I’m asleep!

20 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re in her DMs, my faint presence sits in her Spotify Wrapped through the music I introduced her to. We’re not the same.”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear food, either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,253

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

I think that police officers on foot should wear blue flashing sneakers.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Don’t play with the feelings I barely have.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

If anyone has any experience with anything or knows anything about something, please let me know.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

My sex life is so dead, it has its own tombstone.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

I’m not addicted to Twitter. I’m just a really good listener so I want to know what everyone has to say.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Thank God I have a cat. Who else is gonna shit in this box I have?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

The greatest research skill you can have is being a nosy bitch who wants to find out.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

Stop checking your phone every minute. No one loves you.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

Can we all agree that Mini Cooper drivers need to put an extended flag on the back of their cars so the stalls where they’re parked stop looking empty?

Seen just now on Messenger:

Whether you rip off a bandaid quickly or slowly, I find it’s best to ask the wearer’s permission first.

Just landed via Twitch:

It’s like 10,000 lies when all you need is the files.

Making waves on Twitch:

Breakfast in bed: where your cozy blanket turns into a crumby crime scene.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Reading about two insects who fall in love in Italy. It’s a Rome ants novel.

Live now on TikTok:

When a door closes in life, sometimes it’s better to grab a hammer and nails and make sure the damn thing stays shut.

Just shared via Facebook:

The endings of Lost and Game of Thrones each cost me a television.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I could easily win an Oscar, I just have other things going on right now.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Making waves on Twitch:

I took my kids to the zoo when they were small, I wonder how they are getting on now.

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