Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

I’m not worried about shattering the illusion, I want to smash it to pieces.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Checking my iced coffee rewards points like it’s my 401k.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

People say “I would never,” then here they come nevering like they never nevered before.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Hey! (with the intention of going back to sleep)

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

A Southerner dies every time you people type “ya’ll” instead of “y’all,” btw.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

Sorry, I’m late. My alarm didn’t go off because I didn’t set it, because I don’t want to be here.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

If cats could text you back, they wouldn’t.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

The only thing I worry about when I’m in the restroom is if people are washing their hands or not.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

If you’re reading a book in public, you better be on at least page 140 or something.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,383

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Fact: WhatsApp is the most boring app if you’re single.

Just shared via Discord:

Perhaps the best thing about getting older is that I no longer want to know everything.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Driving between speed cameras is called intermittent fasting.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I hate being a wage slave. I want to be a streamer that does nothing but react to videos all day, and then complain about how hard my life is.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I saw The Blair Witch Project way too young and it made me afraid of projects.

Just landed via Reddit:

Sorry, I’m late. Time isn’t real, and I’m not convinced I am either.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

On a first date, saying “agree to disagree” every time they share anything about themselves.

Seen just now on YouTube:

It’s a little ironic when you consider that the Internet was invented to save time.

Making waves on Pinterest:

People who live in glass houses should be put on a watchlist.

Funny canned goods quotes

New funny canned goods quotes 👇

All funny canned goods quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on TikTok this month:

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

69 shares on X this month:

August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

56 shares on TikTok this month:

Don’t worry. Artificial intelligence will never replace actual ignorance.

85 shares on Discord this month:

Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.

91 shares on Twitch this month:

Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.

16 shares on Messenger this month:

God: “I’m all-knowing but I’d rather be all-forgetting.”

13 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

67 shares on Discord this month:

Some people are living proof that brain failure does not immediately lead to death.

41 shares on Twitch this month:

The problem is I am always the problem.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve been heading in the wrong direction for most of my life, but since the earth is round, I’m just going to stick with it and see it through.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Back in the day, you used to have to listen to records backwards to discover conspiracy theories.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Signatures are so unserious, just “pinky promise” for adults. Write your name in a silly little way on this very important piece of paper so we that we can send you to jail if you do anything wrong.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If you pretend you’re erasing the evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you’ll do a better job, and it actually becomes fun!

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish I was a kid again so everyone would be proud of me for taking a long nap.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst part of coming out of a hyperfixation is sobering up and looking at all the merch you bought that you didn’t need.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Funny thing about zombie movies – they never seem to go after the cameraman.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,511

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I wish flies spoke English, so I could say, ‘Hey, if you don’t leave right now, I am going to kill you so hard.’

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

Sex before marriage is a sin unless you do it doggy style, because all dogs go to heaven. Follow me for more biblical loopholes.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

I fondly remember my days as a younger man when I didn’t care what the weather was going to do.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

On one hand, it’s terrible to not have access to the Internet, but on the other hand, it’s terrible to have access to the Internet.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Christmas can be really hard for single people. Everyone else is having a brilliant time and we have to hide the fact that every day is like that for us.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

What part of “hiii” do you not get? I’m in love with you.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I noticed my mouse problem is back an I yelled at my cats for being lazy and not doing their job, like I was in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

I’m actually really fun once you get to know me (takes 3-4 years).

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

I’m a kid at heart and a senior citizen at my knees and back.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to annoy the shit out of a beautiful man for the rest of my life.

Trending via WeChat:

You aren’t from the Midwest unless you can spin out in the snow, regain control and keep driving like nothing happened.

Live now on X:

You can recognize working-class kids by the fact that they hang their jacket over the chair in the restaurant and not on the coat hook.

Shared recently on X:

The term “domestic housewife” implies the existence of a feral housewife and that is what I aspire to be.

Making waves on Pinterest:

People who read and research will always sound crazy to people who don’t.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

Just landed via Reddit:

Remember that your face is literally a combination of hundreds of generations of people who fell in love!

Making waves on Telegram:

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Trending via YouTube:

Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

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