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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

I’ve used dark mode so much that I’m physically repulsed by white screens now.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

I don’t know who needs to hear this right now, but it’s time to fold the laundry that’s been lying around since last Sunday.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I don’t need therapy, I need a bagel with cream cheese.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my dealer and my alarm is the police.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

The good old days, when you didn’t have to charge your watch and it didn’t constantly remind you how fat you were.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but I finally get why people love cauliflower.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1891 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,053

Funny Quotes Topics

14,836

Funny Quotes Images

12,053

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,444

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Don’t ever let your computer feel that you’re in a hurry, cause they’re gonna slow down more.

Breaking via Reddit:

You feel me? Bro, I haven’t felt anything since the Scholastic Book Fair.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I want a girlfriend so hot that people walking down the street know that I am funny.

Trending via YouTube:

Reoccurring dreams be like: ‘I dunno, here’s a rerun’

Going viral on Telegram:

What we need is more companies making hot sauce. I need 900 more ways to taste a thing that tastes exactly like all the other ones.

Live now on WhatsApp:

There are two wolves inside me, but please no one tell my landlord.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Having now listened to the entire song, I have to say there’s some obvious internal disagreement as to what the Hokey Pokey is all about.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

This too shall pass. And then some other bullshit will come and take its place. It never fucking ends.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Is it possible to die of horniness? Asking for a friend.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1891 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,053

Funny Quotes Topics

14,836

Funny Quotes Images

12,053

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,433

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

You’re way hotter in your forties and fifties than in your twenties. The glow up is in the grow up.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

All women want is to consistently annoy one handsome man forever.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

My door camera alerts are all just me stepping outside to see how warm it is.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

I can’t believe the gall of this bladder.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Drinking coffee because throwing chairs at people is frowned upon.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Going viral on Threads:

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

Just landed via Reddit:

My skin is so dry it’s doing a PowerPoint presentation.

Reported on Messenger:

The human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from the day we’re born and only stops when you’re taking a test or speaking to someone attractive.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

They should have a section on the wing of the plane where people can go out for a cigarette.

Just landed via Reddit:

A big shout-out to all the beekeepers. Our unstung heroes.

Just landed via YouTube:

Bro, you’re fine. You just need an impossible sequence of events to play out in perfect order against all odds and you’ll be fine.

Going viral on TikTok:

Wealthy person who has no problems and also meditates sometimes: Meditation is my secret weapon.

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