Commentary:
Trying to change an idiot's mind is like trying to teach a cat to bark! 🐱🙉
12 Funny evidence quotes
There is no physical evidence to say that today is Tuesday, we all just have to trust that someone kept count since the first one ever.
Commentary:
Looks like we've all just agreed to play along with the world's longest game of "Guess the Day" 🤔📆😂
Sometimes I clean my room so dramatically, it feels like I’m erasing evidence.
Commentary:
Cleaning my room like it's a crime scene and I'm the culprit. 🕵️♀️🧹🚫🙈
If you pretend you’re erasing the evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you’ll do a better job, and it actually becomes fun!
Commentary:
Channeling my inner crime scene investigator while scrubbing away! 🚿🕵️♂️🔪 Who knew bathroom cleaning could be such a thriller? 😄
My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.
Commentary:
"With my DNA all over the place, I'd be caught before the crime is even committed! 🚔🔬😂"
Not to brag but I am evidence of things unseen.
Commentary:
"Who needs proof when I am living proof! 👀✨ Don't worry, I won't hold it against you for not being as invisible as me!"
Twitter is evidence that insane people can be extremely entertaining from a safe distance.
Commentary:
"Twitter: Where the crazy show is just a scroll away! 🤪📱 Enjoying the chaos from a safe distance has never been more entertaining! 🤣 #TwitterTales"
Journaling was the most useless thing l ever attempted. Not only am I still suffering but now there’s evidence.
Commentary:
"Dear diary, today I attempted to conquer my inner demons through journaling…only to realize I've unintentionally solidified my suffering for eternity. 📔😂 #FailedTherapy"
There’s nothing like sitting by an open fire and watching the evidence burn.
Commentary:
Ah, the majestic symphony of crackling flames as they consume the evidence of all those questionable decisions. 🔥🔥 Who needs a shredder when you have a cozy fire to handle your problems? Just be sure to invite some marshmallows for a guilt-free alibi! 😉🔥
All the observable evidence suggests that, if I was much worse at my job, I’d be more likely to get a promotion to senior management.
Commentary:
"Well, who knew incompetence could be the key to success in the corporate world? 🤷♂️ Maybe it's time to start making intentional mistakes! 😉 #PromotionByAccident"