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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

You gotta ask people nowadays, are you single single, mad at your partner single, blocked single or single just in your head.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I wish pets lived longer, and life wasn’t so expensive, and cake didn’t make you fat, and people weren’t twats.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

I’m not a morning person. I’m not even an afternoon person. I pretty much start functioning after 6pm.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

My biggest sexual fantasy is someone throwing a million dollars on my naked body and then leaving me alone.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

When life gives you lemons, give them back and ask what the crap is all about.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Nothing is more awkward than trying to tell an online joke to offline people.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Everyone’s a gangster until the grocery store switches their aisles around.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1864 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,026

Funny Quotes Topics

14,819

Funny Quotes Images

12,026

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Trending via YouTube:

Why can’t hackers just delete everyone’s bad debt, credit, and mortgages?

Spotted on Discord:

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Seen just now on YouTube:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I hate how l am a “I have an appointment at 4pm so I can’t do anything all day” type of person.

Going viral on Instagram:

Sex is cool, but have you ever found an academic article that fits your research topic perfectly and supports all of your claims?

Making waves on TikTok:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Going viral on TikTok:

Every time I watch “The Godfather”, I notice some new detail (they’re Italian???).

Seen just now on Facebook:

Life is just a series of Sopranos references with some other things mixed in.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I keep forgetting i’m at the age where people will tell me they’re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1864 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,026

Funny Quotes Topics

14,819

Funny Quotes Images

12,026

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

We’d never met, or even spoken, but I could tell just from gazing into her pale blue eyes I had stepped on her toe.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Everyone becomes a robo-dancer when the motion sensor faucet isn’t working.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

I’m just going to flip this omelette… Okay, we’re having scrambled eggs.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

The term “domestic housewife” implies the existence of a feral housewife and that is what I aspire to be.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Drive like no one is watching.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

I used to think that the older you get, the wiser and more self-confident you become. I now know that you just get tired more quickly.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Apparently, throwing the remote against the wall didn’t help recharging the batteries.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

She was rare. Like a meth head with good teeth.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

There’s nothing like sitting by an open fire and watching the evidence burn.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Snapchat:

There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

Making waves on Telegram:

The internet is fun because you can post about mayonnaise and somehow end up in a fight.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

“Those tattoos will make it harder to get a job!” Okay, well so will my personality.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

It’s exciting to receive a Valentine’s Day card and not know who it’s from. A Father’s Day card, not so much.

Just landed via TikTok:

Old Spice doesn’t sound like something you wanna smell.

Just landed via Facebook:

I would love to be normal, but unfortunately, I was raised by the internet and a microwave.

Breaking via Discord:

I’m sorry I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

Freshly posted on X:

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

Trending via TikTok:

They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I had a hard time coping with the divorce. I’m fine now, but at first I was almost crazy with joy.

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