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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

If you get hangovers, it’s because you drank the beers with impure intentions and heavy karmic debt.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Sorry I’m late, I was fighting for my right to party.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

I wish I could get a bouquet of mozzarella sticks.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Who needs therapy when you can just cry in a fast-food parking lot.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I just want a bar where I can pour my own drink, have music at a normal volume, and there are no people, and it’s my house.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Putting away the Christmas tree. Sad day for cats.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,282

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Talking to animals doesn’t make you crazy, hearing them talk back does.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Hot person: wow, everyone here is so nice.

Trending via X:

Stay up till 4 a.m. one night, and your sleep schedule is ruined for the next 4 years.

Shared recently on Discord:

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

Spotted on Telegram:

Maybe the real American dream is the debt we collected along the way.

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Just shared via Instagram:

Canceled a date for a date with another guy, and that guy canceled. It’s what I deserve.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

It’s important to fuel your body with essential nutrients, which can be found in cookies, chips, and candy.

Spotted on Telegram:

Most men will receive their first bunch of flowers at their funeral.

Funny dark web quotes

Funny dark web quotes 💀😂 bring a twisted twist to the mysterious corners of the internet. Dive into a world where humor meets the shadows, making the eerie a little more entertaining. Whether you’re a curious netizen or just here for laughs, these quotes add a cheeky spark to the dark web’s secretive vibe. Ready to explore the lighter side of the deep? Let’s get this spooky comedy started! 🎭🕵️‍♂️✨

New funny dark web quotes 👇

I consider the second page of Google results the dark web.

1 week ago

consider, dark, dark web, engine, Google, Google result, humor, i, internet, internet humor, joke, online, online joke, page, result, results, search, search engine, second, web, web page
A more accurate description would be ‘The Darker Web’.

2 weeks ago

accurate, dark, dark web, description, humor, internet, joke, satire, technology, web

All funny dark web quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Messenger this month:

They should make you watch a training video and pass a little test before you’re allowed to touch the office coffee maker.

68 shares on Facebook this month:

One minute you’re young and carefree. The next minute you can feel in your knee when it starts to rain.

37 shares on Messenger this month:

Establish dominance by asking your dentist if he’s flossing everyday.

31 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

95 shares on Reddit this month:

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

72 shares on Messenger this month:

Marriage is so scary. What do you mean I can’t have my own room?

94 shares on YouTube this month:

Haggis – the meal you have to stomach twice.

84 shares on Snapchat this month:

You can get addicted to a certain kind of swagness.

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’ve had 50 birthdays in a row without being arrested, which I’d say is an impressive streak!

65 shares on Telegram this month:

Nothing is complicated when you’re simple-minded like me.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Cheesecake dislikers are attention seekers.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My toxic trait is that I expect people to have common sense, and I get mad when they don’t.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Always tell people different stories about yourself, so when they talk about you, they’ll argue.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s funny how people without pizzas in their hands actually think I’ll answer my door.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve never had a beer in the shower; I’m saving it for a very low moment in my life.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Dudes get a MacBook, and all of a sudden, they got work to do in public places.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The subtle art of surviving this life with grace and dignity.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,501

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

In the morning: Tired! At lunchtime: Tired! In the evening: Tired! In bed: “Everybody dance now!”

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

I will never sell out my integrity unless I am offered something for it.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

My husband said I use a lot of makeup, so I showed him some makeup tutorials on TikTok and I don’t think he’ll be making that mistake again.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s… you can now fall asleep sitting up on the couch at any given moment.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

4 sneezes in a row is clout chasing. Wrap it up!

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Sorry I missed your call, I was staring in horror at the screen, wondering why on earth you couldn’t just text me.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

The problem with parental controls is I need my kid to help me figure out how to set them up.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

I do not use AI, I use Reddit commenters’ opinions as fact because they are right.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

Seeing an animal sigh is so funny to me. Like, what happened, buddy?

Live now on Threads:

Diet tip: Your pants can’t get too tight if you never wear any.

Just shared via Reddit:

My car spider built a web across my steering wheel and now I can’t go anywhere.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Oligarchy sounds like something you dip your breadstick in at the olive garden.

Trending via Reddit:

My problem with Christmas shopping is that I keep seeing things that I like… for me.

Breaking via YouTube:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you miss your wife enough.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Monday morning looks like Jack Nicholson breaking through the door in The Shining.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

We can put a man on the moon but we can’t find a good way to drink wine from a lying down position.

Seen just now on Threads:

Gonna eat birthday cake all day because it’s someone’s birthday out there, and we’re about to celebrate together, stranger.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Grok, is this true? Grok, am I original? Grok, am I the only one? Grok, am I sexual?

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