Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Lou Read is the name of my favorite musician and also the book I keep in the toilet.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

The endings of Lost and Game of Thrones each cost me a television.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

According to the BMI chart, I am too short.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

I hope “be the light you want to see in the world” doesn’t refer to Molotov Cocktails.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

And to my great-grandchildren, I leave 48,567 screenshots.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

You look like the kind of person who would hit rock bottom and then start drilling.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Rock bottom should give me free sandwich and coffee for how often I hit it.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

I’m not just a pretty face, I’m also a massive disappointment to my family.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,253

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Car naps hit different, especially when you are the one driving.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Facebook is like a never-ending high school reunion.

Seen just now on Threads:

I’m so high at Home Depot right now, and I have to ask where the hose at. And I know I’mma laugh when I do.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

Trending via YouTube:

My apologies to the Goodreads reviewer who found my novel about vampires on a submarine, “unrealistic.”

Going viral on X:

I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

People moaning and making noise over food makes me so livid I can’t keep it in.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Had an interview today, and my belly rumbled. The lady goes, “Missed lunch?” I told her, “Nah, I’m hungry for success!”

Going bananas on Snapchat:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

Live now on Threads:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

Funny divisible quotes

Funny divisible quotes add a splash of math magic and laughter to your day! 🧮😂 Whether you’re a numbers nerd or just love clever wordplay, these witty gems make division feel anything but boring. Ready to split your sides with puns and playful math humor? Get set for a countdown of smiles and chuckles that prove math can be seriously funny! 🎉➗😄

New funny divisible quotes 👇

All funny divisible quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

26 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Nothing in a household is said more lovingly than, “Can you bring me some toilet paper?”

80 shares on YouTube this month:

“You’re a flirt!” God forbid a girl has good communication skills.

42 shares on Facebook this month:

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

12 shares on TikTok this month:

According to a study, people believe anything that starts with ‘according to a study’.

96 shares on Telegram this month:

When I was a kid, I had to walk to Netflix.

81 shares on X this month:

Hear me out, a Q-Tip that doesn’t bounce out the trash can when you throw it away.

74 shares on Pinterest this month:

Canadians are nice because they’re close to Santa.

52 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Only 6 hours, 45 minutes and 35 years until I’m done with work.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Slowly I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

56 shares on Instagram this month:

The universe clearly isn’t working as it should so someone should turn it off and back on again.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

You come from dust and you’ll return to dust, so that’s why I never dust. It could be someone I know.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t ring my doorbell unless you’re accompanied by a camera crew and holding balloons and a big check.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

If you tell lies about me, I’ll tell the truth about you.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Ten million people accused me of exaggerating today.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My hair would never allow me to commit a crime. I really do leave my DNA everywhere.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Now that I’m in my mid-forties, I think I’ll take up parkour.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re dating an alpha female, you need to know that they need to be babied at night, or else they will turn into a dragon.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,620

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

The only thing smart about you is your wisdom tooth.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

A beautiful woman should never have to send an email. Yet, such tragedies occur every day.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Napping is the best activity for weight loss, because I can’t eat anything when I’m asleep!

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Packed all my meds into one bottle for a trip and accidentally invented the best trail mix.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

I don’t know how to mop my kitchen floor without pretending l’m cleaning up a gruesome crime scene.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

They should send the Epstein list to everyone’s phones like that U2 album.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

The show “How I Met Your Mother” was just a really long TED talk.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

The real flex is becoming the woman he cannot run back to.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Pinterest:

ChatGPT’s primary use is to generate plausible excuses to leave dinner at the in-laws’.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m officially at the age where I enjoy when people cancel plans.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

Just shared via X:

I’m really into writing short fiction, mainly to-do lists.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Normalize mouthing the lyrics to the song in your headphones in public.

Trending via TikTok:

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

“You’re not allowed to be grumpy on a Friday, it’s in the fine print somewhere.”

Going viral on Instagram:

Pretending I’m asleep so my boss has to carry me to the meeting.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

My wife is refusing to bring me a beer. That’s it, gonna text her and say “I cannot believe how lazy you are”.

Just landed via Instagram:

Showering & getting in bed is literally one of the best combos ever.

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