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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

If I’m too much for you, then go and find less.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Meeting Beyoncé and telling her I loved her in Goldmember and mentioning nothing about her music career, just to see if it throws her off.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

I have been putting a lot of thought into it, and I just don’t think being an adult is going to work for me.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

I welcome change as long as nothing is altered or different than before.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Just saw a bird run across the street if you were wondering if anyone else is wasting their gifts.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

I feel like people just come to the airport to cough.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

I hate it when someone gives me a valid solution to my problem and I have to find something new to complain about.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

We live in a time where intelligent people are being silenced, so that stupid people won’t be offended.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

In other news, congrats to my therapist for securing a 4 year contract with me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2406 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,568

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,568

Updated

12 minutes ago

Users Online

3,449

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via LinkedIn:

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

A dating app for people who are shy called Mumble.

Just landed via Snapchat:

A mustache is just mouth bangs.

Spotted on Facebook:

Hey, sorry I can’t go out tonight. I already showered and got into bed, and now I’m busy rubbing my feet together like a little grasshopper.

Making waves on Facebook:

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

Making waves on Reddit:

Screw you guys, I’m gonna go make friends with the crows.

Shared recently on Facebook:

We work all week to work some more around the house all weekend long. Isn’t life grand?

Making waves on Telegram:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

A plus of getting older is not having to make as much small talk because half the conversation is spent asking the other person to repeat what they just said.

Seen just now on Threads:

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2406 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,568

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,568

Updated

12 minutes ago

Users Online

3,457

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

I love reaching into my messy bag looking for something and everyone around me hears like glass breaking and bombs going off and a cat meowing from inside there.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

I love when I come home, I put on my Adam Sandler clothes.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Spending the day with my mom and her mom, just observing the patterns.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Boy, you made these perimenopausal ovaries come back to life,” – me flirting.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

The pizza delivery guys say “see you tomorrow” to everyone, right?

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Guy inventing jogging: how can I suffer, but with music?

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

A fitness trainer showed me the proper way to inhale and exhale and then got pissed when I told her she had nice breaths.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

I saw a spider crawl under my kid’s bed and was too tired to go after it, but that’s okay, no living creature can survive that environment.

Shared recently on Discord:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

Making waves on Twitch:

Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Everyone thinks they’re a badass until seaweed brushes their leg.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Silently hoping for a comet to strike, to get out of today’s responsibilities.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I love when toddlers passionately talk to you about absolutely nothing.

Spotted on Slack:

I always have a bad connection in my head when someone tries to explain a card or board game to me.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

“Ooh, you’ve caught the sun.” Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Yeah, bro, she’s probably just not using her phone right now, for the first time ever in her whole life.

Breaking via Instagram:

Online dating is stupid because scent is such an important factor of attraction.

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