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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I don’t want to brag but I walked into a room and remembered why I walked in.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

When I was a kid I thought shrimp cocktails had alcohol in them and I thought it was such a weird way to get drunk.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

“Twister 3” should be told from a cow’s POV.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

When I was a kid, we weren’t allowed to use our phones in school. Mainly because the cords wouldn’t reach.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Therapists are like, “You don’t owe anyone anything. Except me. You owe me 250 dollars for this session.”

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

It must be hard for a vampire to floss their fangs when they can’t see their reflection in a mirror.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,531

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on TikTok:

Adulting is when you realize that all you need is a home, stable income and a peaceful partner.

Just landed via WeChat:

Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

Trending via Instagram:

wearing no bra and oversized clothes is self-care at its finest

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’m so tired. Let’s see all of the horrible things happening in the world today before I try to sleep peacefully.

Going viral on YouTube:

Biting the heads off all these gingerbread men if you wanna swing by.

Spotted on Discord:

To the people who have only fans, what’s stopping you from upgrading to an air conditioner?

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but no one in the world is judging you as much as you’re judging yourself. People online: Hold my beer.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Funny empath quotes

Funny empath quotes bring a lighthearted twist to the superpower of feeling ALL the feels 🌈💖. If you’ve ever laughed (or cried) at your own emotional radar going haywire, these witty gems are your new BFFs 😂🤯. Perfect for empaths who embrace their sensitive side with humor, they turn deep vibes into LOL moments. Ready to giggle while embracing your inner emotional ninja? Let’s dive in! 🎉✨

New funny empath quotes 👇

All funny empath quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on Instagram this month:

The trick of life is to get the sports car before you have to grunt getting in and out of it.

65 shares on Discord this month:

I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it!

96 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Went for a run this morning. That bee was huge!

97 shares on Facebook this month:

My DNA came back saying I come from a wide selection of cheeses.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

Seeing yourself on a FaceTime screenshot really humbles you.

95 shares on Threads this month:

Home is where the clothes rack stands in the way.

14 shares on Slack this month:

Welcome to your 40’s: See that kid dressed up like a cop? He is a cop.

71 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t always say something stupid. But when I do, I keep talking and make it worse.

78 shares on Threads this month:

Breakups are hard, but have you ever been disappointed in the food you ordered?

30 shares on WeChat this month:

The fastest mammal on earth is the smartass on the web.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Pleasantly surprised to discover the treadmill I bought came with a remote control, so I can run it from my recliner.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If I was the inventor of healing, I would have made it linear, I can tell you that much.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

“Love is in the air.” Wrong. Microplastics.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

We’d all look younger if we just avoided young people.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Microdosing Christmas by being present.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

You know what brought my home value up? Not having an angry man in it.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,399

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Imagine if you spent all your time studying, actually studying.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Welcome to Elephant in the Room club, no one talks about it.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Going to ragebait men by asking, “Do you ever wish you were tall?”

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

I only like when it rains when I’m home.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

Made a lot of mistakes in my life, but adding more cheese than a recipe calls for isn’t one of them.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Me driving at night: I hope this is the road!

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Noise cancelling headphones but for when the noises are coming from inside your head.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

People can’t drive you crazy if you don’t give them the keys.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Messenger:

Hugging helps break the tension with strangers in elevators.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I feel like a credit card, cause I’m constantly being used irresponsibly.

Just shared via Snapchat:

My father didn’t want kids, so he had two kids, which was the equivalent of zero kids at the time.

Making waves on WeChat:

If you ever need nothing, I’m here for you.

Shared recently on X:

I think everyone should get $500 deposited into their accounts every day, just for waking up.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

My signature move is to tell men that I can’t hear them because I have my headphones in when I quite visibly don’t have headphones in.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Silence is golden. But duct tape is silver.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Next on Tiny Houses: A family of 6 moves into a boat emoji.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: “Close Enough.”

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