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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Restaurant toilets are dangerous! So many of my dates have gone to use them and vanished.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

I want my name to come up when you go to confession.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

If life could stop teaching me lessons, that would be great.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

“Love is in the air.” Wrong. Microplastics.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

God creating the duck: waterproof that chicken and give it a kazoo.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Where do cicadas go when they’re not screaming? I’d like to go there and scream.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Oh, Amazon, no. Please do not tell me how many packages I had delivered this year; that is none of my business.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Dear algorithm, please show this post only to people who have innate psionic abilities and would use their abilities for the betterment of humanity if given a chance.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Sunday should be 48 hours instead of 24 hours, I need more time to be ready for Monday.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,722

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

Going viral on Facebook:

If you want people to have kind words when you pass, you should say kind words when you’re alive.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

To save money, you really just gotta stay at home.

Just shared via WeChat:

Another Monday that no one asked for.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

“At your big age” is one of my favorite insults.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Best time to reach me is when I’m at work. Don’t bother me when I’m at home.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I can clean the whole house if I want to, but if someone asks me to do it, suddenly I’m lazy.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI send 5 emails a day and check their fantasy football line-ups on and off for 8 hours.

Going viral on Threads:

A little mischievousness is good for the soul.

Going viral on Threads:

I bring a sort of “this isn’t actually urgent” vibe to the workplace that managers don’t like.

Funny england quotes

Funny England quotes bring a cheeky twist to the quirks of British life 🇬🇧😂 From tea obsessions to rainy day vibes ☔️🍵, these witty sayings capture the perfect blend of charm and sarcasm. Whether you’re a Brit or just love all things England, get ready to laugh out loud and celebrate the humor behind the Union Jack! 🎉🤣 #BritishHumor #LOL

New funny england quotes 👇

In England “booster shot” is spelled “borchestershire shot”.

0

2 months ago

booster, booster shot, borchestershire, england, humor, joke, language, shot, spelled, wordplay
Spider-Man, but set in rural England so he just has to walk everywhere.

0

2 months ago

countryside, england, everywhere, humor, just, rural, rural England, setting, Spider-Man, superhero, transportation, walk

All funny england quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

68 shares on X this month:

At my age I don’t sleep, I nap between pee breaks.

92 shares on Instagram this month:

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

The fewer friends at your birthday party means more cake for you. Follow me for more life hacks.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Had salad for the third night in a row and now I get why you’re so angry, vegans.

20 shares on Messenger this month:

Just once I’d like my dog to give me a treat.

80 shares on YouTube this month:

Getting an entry-level job before the release of ChatGPT in 2022 was like taking the last chopper out of Vietnam. Few realize this yet.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

47 shares on Facebook this month:

Me every time I wake up: Oh no, not again!

71 shares on Slack this month:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

12 shares on Instagram this month:

“You handled that with such grace” are words that have never been spoken to me.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“There’s something beautifully intimate about never speaking to a person again.”

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Driving a newer car is like “Oh weird, this one doesn’t have Shake on Highway, maybe they stopped making that feature”.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

A dating app to meet other people with low IQ called OK Stupid.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t rush me, I’m still deciding whether I’ll be productive or not today!

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Good things happen when you smile or when you’re naked.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My career plan? Win the lottery and disappear.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

She was unique, like a millennial that could drive a stick shift.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I think I’ll spend my savings on a lifetime supply of pasta. Worth every penne.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Yeah, I have a drinking problem. It’s called dehydration.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,477

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Clothes too dirty for the closet, but too clean for laundry. Welcome to: the chair.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Me: God, please stop giving me your toughest battles. God: You just have to empty the dishwasher.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Why can’t opportunity just come back later?

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

If you have ever spent an hour on Twitter then you understand why there’s such an urgency to create Artificial Intelligence.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Me, whenever I can easily do some yoga pose, “This can’t be right.”

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Good things take time, that’s why I’m always late.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Good morning to everyone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won’t feel like you are lonely any more.

Spotted on Instagram:

The USA is having so many disasters and tragedies, you’d almost think it was built on thousands of ancient Indian burial grounds.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’m sick of living through history!

Spotted on YouTube:

The algorithm knows about that thing you like that you’re denying yourself of.

Just shared via Threads:

As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.

Going viral on Slack:

Are oranges called oranges because they are orange, or is the color orange called orange because an orange is orange?

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

Just shared via Messenger:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Spotted on Discord:

So proud of my ancestors for crawling out of the sea and evolving lungs. Pretty disappointed in them ever since though.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴