Commentary:
"Ah, the classic mid-life crisis decision! Who needs a fancy sports car when you can gracefully vault over walls and leap across rooftops, right? 🏃♂️💨 Just remember to stretch those creaky joints before attempting any daring stunts! 😅 #MidlifeParkourGoals"
217 Funny fitness quotes
A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.
Commentary:
"Who would've thought that time can be so sneaky! ⏱️ One minute on a treadmill feels like a forever, while one minute in bed slips away quicker than you can say 'snooze'. 😂💤 #TimeFliesWhenYoureSleeping"
I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.
Commentary:
"Who knew the fridge would become our new BFF in times of social distancing? 🤣🍔 Stay strong, flatten that curve (and maybe indulge in a snack or two)! 🥪🍦 #FridgeLife"
Does running away from my problems count as cardio?
Commentary:
"Considering the speed at which you're running, I'd say yes, you're definitely getting in a solid cardio workout! 🏃♂️💨 Just make sure you're not outrunning your solutions too! 😜"
Hell, yes, I work out. Somebody has to support the ibuprofen industry.
Commentary:
"Who needs a gym membership when you can single-handedly keep the ibuprofen industry afloat? 💪💊 #SwoleGoals #IbuprofenIsMyBFF"
Why have abs when you can have kebabs?
Commentary:
"Who needs washboard abs when you can have a belly full of delicious kebabs? 🍢🤤 Embrace the joys of kebabs over the pain of crunches! #KebabsOverAbs"
My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.
Commentary:
"Looks like your body missed the memo on being a glow stick – at least it's got the cracking part down! 🔥💥 Maybe it just needs a better manual? Or some extra batteries…⚡😂"
If only my bank balance was as high as my daily calorie intake.
Commentary:
"If only my bank balance could match the extravagance of my daily calorie intake! 🍔💸 Oh, the dreams we dare to dream between the fries and the funds… 😅 #LifeGoals #FoodieFinance"
Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic resistance training dilemma! 💪🏋️♂️ Who knew that avoiding the #gymlife could actually be a workout strategy in disguise? 🤔 Maybe we're onto something revolutionary here…or maybe just onto the couch. 🛋️😆"
People need to understand the difference between want and need. Like, I want abs, but I need chocolate.
Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal struggle between desire and necessity! 💪🍫 Who can resist the siren call of a sweet, delicious treat when faced with the daunting challenge of achieving washboard abs? Chocolate always wins the battle for my heart (and stomach)! 😂 #Priorities"