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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

“I can’t possibly lose this if I put it here” I say to myself before completely forgetting where here is.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Using my one phone call to call Santa.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

At what age do people actually meet up to play bingo? I’m ready.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

“I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

I could tell my beard needed a trim when I started seeing some of the pictures my kids were drawing of me.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Men will ruin your whole life and come back and like your Instagram story.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the first twelve digits of pi.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

A couple of birds are outside fighting. Wait. They’ve quieted down. There’s a third bird. I think he may be their therapist.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

Men are very good at being women lately.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

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Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

There is always enough for the needy, there is never enough for the greedy.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Sometimes I shower in the dark and pretend I’m in a rainforest on an alien planet.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Getting your hair washed by someone else is one of life’s greatest joys no one really speaks about often.

Going viral on Reddit:

The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

Breaking via Slack:

Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I mostly stopped responding to emails three years ago, and aside from various consequences, it’s been fine.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Twitter is like a mental hospital where everyone thinks they are the only sane person and everyone else is crazy.

Shared recently on Instagram:

My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.

Trending via Twitch:

May the hardest part of your day be getting the jeans over your butt.

Funny gay best friend quotes

New funny gay best friend quotes 👇

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

3 days ago

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All funny gay best friend quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

Always be kind. You never know who has subscriptions to your favorite streaming apps.

82 shares on X this month:

If you see my account doing wild or out-of-character things, no worries. It’s not me, I routinely rent it out as an Airbnb.

98 shares on Messenger this month:

Nobody watches you harder than people who don’t like you, so give them a show they will never forget.

54 shares on X this month:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

45 shares on Slack this month:

I just be minding my business, and next thing you know, a payment is due.

63 shares on TikTok this month:

What substance do I have to abuse to stop yearning?

63 shares on Threads this month:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

27 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My father didn’t want kids, so he had two kids, which was the equivalent of zero kids at the time.

73 shares on Reddit this month:

Nothing says entitlement like a goose family crossing the road.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

Putting my Christmas tree up today. Big day for my cats.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Do you ever look into your cats eyes and realize that a person is inside there?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

That depressing moment when you start your car to go to work and it doesn’t explode.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

My husband keeps borrowing and losing my tweezers, so I’m naming this chin hair after him.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

I make her eyes roll back. Not in bed though. I’m just annoying.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

I used to party all night. Now I check the weather forecast for the next day to see if it’s a good laundry day.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

The most unrealistic part of cooking shows is when they have enough room in their fridge to fit an entire baking sheet.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Can’t wait for my husband to see what he bought everyone for Christmas.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Getting old would be so fun if you didn’t wake up each morning with neck pain that suggests you slept hanging upside down like a bat.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Putting a baby on board sticker on my car because other drivers have a right to know who they’re dealing with behind the wheel.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Quickie so fast, it’s called secs.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

I keep all my valuables near the front door so if burglars breaks in during the night they will not wake me up.

Making waves on Snapchat:

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

All the clouds have come out to play today.

Going bananas on Discord:

Called in, “Taking a gap year.”

Seen just now on Twitch:

The only thing I worry about when I’m in the restroom is if people are washing their hands or not.

Going viral on Instagram:

Just because I’m smiling doesn’t mean I like you, I might be picturing you on fire.

Shared recently on TikTok:

If I was an elephant, you’d all be sorry.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Can you imagine being a 7th grade girl and being able to see your crush’s bedroom during Zoom math class.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

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Funny gay best friend quotes

New funny gay best friend quotes 👇

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

All funny gay best friend quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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