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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

I feel sorry for non-glasses wearers. They’ll never know the joy of cleaning them and suddenly being upgraded to the UHD package.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

Starting all my work emails today with, “to whom it’s about to concern”.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

When someone says “I expected more of you”, I’m always like “well who’s fault is that?”

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Turns out “V for Vendetta” is not an educational movie and it won’t teach your kids the alphabet.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be using humor to hide pain.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the holiday traffic I said I’d avoid even though I did nothing to avoid it.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Stop bringing shitty Bluetooth speakers on hikes. No one came to the woods to hear you listen to Katy Perry.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

793 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,955

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,955

Updated

6 minutes ago

Users Online

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

They say there’s no such thing as a stupid question, but then they’ll go and wake you up to ask if you’re asleep.

Freshly posted on Discord:

The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?

Seen just now on Telegram:

Unfollowers, take me with you!

Making waves on Threads:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

Just landed via Facebook:

Welcome to your 40s, you now respond to every younger person telling you their age with “Jesus Christ”.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Rorschach tests are like so easy. Everything’s either a demon or a butterfly and it’s up to you to decide.

Reported on Reddit:

Got out of jury duty yesterday by confessing to the crime.

Reported on Reddit:

With a lollipop in one hand and a dandelion in the other, concentration is very important, as every summer child knows.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Socks teach us that being made for each other does not mean being together.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

793 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,955

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,955

Updated

6 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

When I’m done eating… I have to show my hands to my cat, like I’m a blackjack dealer.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

I only write when I am falling in love, or falling apart.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

Karma has taught me to never laugh at a stranger being attacked by a seagull.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

All cars should have a rubber bumper all the way around so we can hit each other.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

I am at the age where I question throwing away a box because, “It’s a really nice box.”

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

For the amount of meat you get out of clam, I feel like we could just leave them alone.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

At the Pride and Prejudice showing booing whenever Prejudice comes on screen.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

The key to looking amazing is looking like shit most of the time, so it’s more of a surprise.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via X:

Some hoodies don’t hoodie the way other hoodies hoodie.

Just shared via WeChat:

A dating app for people who are way too into cookies, called Crumble.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Microplastics are a waste of time. I go straight to eating whole packaging.

Just landed via TikTok:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

Making waves on Instagram:

It can be so healing to stay up until 3am. Unfortunately, it will also completely ruin your life.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

One of my biggest fears during a zombie apocalypse is having to sleep without a fan.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

If you give me a serious answer to a silly question, I’m giving you a wedgie.

Reported on Threads:

At first, big breasts were attractive, then suddenly it was big butts. I’m waiting for it to finally be big bellies.

Seen just now on X:

The police said I was a ‘suspect’, but I prefer being called a ‘person of interest’.

Just shared via X:

Girl talk is my favorite. You go from discussing goals to talking about shoes, to hating men, to planning a trip in six minutes.

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