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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Told my homie I was “going through it” and he just said “go around it”.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

If I shook my head at every stupid thing I saw, I’d have permanent whiplash.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

The only recipes they have online are where I’m the one who’s supposed to buy all this stuff and then make it. That’s not what I’m looking for.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

ROMO (relief of missing out)

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be just water.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

During arguments with idiots, I wish I could throw a flash bang and disappear.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Refusing to attend my brother’s gambling intervention until they agree to call it a slot shaming.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Never trust a man that’s good at flirting. He’s had too much practice.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

2 hours ago

Users Online

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

Why can’t periods just last for an hour? Like, you made your point, I’m not pregnant, you can leave now.

Just shared via Telegram:

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I avoid drama by being unpopular.

Spotted on Facebook:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

Spotted on Facebook:

Getting older means talking to less people and complaining about more people.

Just shared via Threads:

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

Shared recently on Discord:

Using my invisible hula hoop really freaks people out.

Just shared via Instagram:

I love routine. Until I’m bored, then I love excitement. Until I’m overwhelmed, then I love routine.

Spotted on Discord:

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

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Funny lawless quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

2 hours ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Remember before social media you would have to pick up the phone and call someone to tell them how much you love bacon?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

In the event of a water landing, place the life jacket over your head and swipe your credit card to inflate.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

I’d enjoy summer a lot more if someone came by hourly and misted me like produce.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

My favorite thing about summer is opening a window for 30 seconds so an insect that hasn’t been identified by science yet can fly into your home.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

That fight could’ve been an email.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Every night, millions of teeth go unbrushed.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here pumping gas until the dollar amount ends with 0.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Ripping the fishnets off my slutty little oranges.

Trending via TikTok:

Not now, I’m busy doing tax crimes on my abacus.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

God: “You’re all a bunch of bastards and I should never have created you.”

Just landed via TikTok:

My one cat vomited her dinner and then the other cat went in and started eating it. And that, my friends, is what ChatGPT is to me.

Live now on YouTube:

I don’t usually think about what I say before I say it. I prefer to think about it after I’ve said it, late at night, for the rest of my life.

Breaking via Reddit:

The Masters would be a lot more interesting if there were starving alligators roaming throughout the golf course.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Every group chat has that one person who never replies, and it’s me.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Googled my symptoms and it turns out it’s just the politics.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Perhaps the best thing about getting older is that I no longer want to know everything.

Live now on Instagram:

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

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