Wordgag ツ

4 months ago
Share →: When people ask me what is more important, food or love, I don’t answer because I’m eating.

Commentary:
"Sorry, can't decide between food and love right now. My mouth is too busy experiencing a flavor explosion to provide a coherent response. Ask again after dessert!"
4 months ago
Share →: I love my bodyguard. I would take a bullet for him.

Commentary:
Well, well, it looks like the bodyguard has found a true friend in you! Taking a bullet is definitely a step up from just holding the door open or carrying groceries. Let's just hope you two won't have to test that bond anytime soon!
$Funny love quotes - I hate math, but I love counting money.$

4 months ago
Share →: I hate math, but I love counting money.

Commentary:
"Who needs algebra when you have the sweet sound of cash registers as your soundtrack? Counting money is like therapy for the soul – it's the kind of math we can all get behind!"
4 months ago
Share →: Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.

Commentary:
"Failed relationships are like a budget beauty store – a lot of wasted make-up with no happy ending in sight!"
4 months ago
Share →: I feel a deep connection to librarians because I also love telling people to shut up.

Commentary:
"Ah, a kindred spirit indeed! Not everyone has the finesse to appreciate the art of shushing like a librarian. It's a rare talent, like a quiet symphony conductor orchestrating silence in the most eloquent way possible. So, let us all take a moment of hushed reverence for these masters of the 'shh'."
4 months ago
Share →: Relationship so bad you start relating to Taylor Swift songs.

Commentary:
"When your relationship reaches Taylor Swift level drama, it's like you're living in your very own country music ballad. Just remember, there's no shame in belting out those lyrics and pretending you're in your own music video – complete with the dramatic breakup scene and inevitable revenge plot twist!"
4 months ago
Share →: My knight in shining armor comes in liquid form.

Commentary:
"Just when you thought your knight in shining armor would ride in on a white horse, turns out he's actually a tall glass of wine! Who needs sword fights when you have a liquid hero ready to rescue you from reality one sip at a time?"
4 months ago
Share →: The world is in chaos, confess to your crush!

Commentary:
"Well, if the world is in chaos anyway, might as well add a little more drama to it by confessing your feelings to your crush! Who knows, maybe love is the answer to all this chaos…or at least a good distraction!"
4 months ago
Share →: A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Commentary:
"Ah, the majestic relationship, just like a shark – impressive from a distance, but up close, you realize it's not all smooth sailing and dreamy music playing in the background. So, maybe it's best to enjoy your relationships like you do with sharks – from a safe distance and through the lens of a screen!"
4 months ago
Share →: I love my new crockpot. Now we can wait longer to eat my horrible cooking.

Commentary:
"Ah, the magic of the crockpot – turning bad cooking into a gourmet slow-cooked masterpiece! Who knew procrastination could taste so good?"