Commentary:
Feeling fancy while contemplating existential questions with a $19 burger 😎🍔💸
750 Funny love quotes
Just because I loved you at one point doesn’t mean I will always love you. I’m not Whitney Houston.
Commentary:
Guess I'll save my greatest love for karaoke night! 🎤😂
The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.
Commentary:
Achieving absolute singularity: when you and your countless imaginary cats star in your love song playlist 🎶🐱😂
Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a cheeseburger.
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When your soulmate is a cheeseburger and you're okay with that 🍔😍💘
I love reading a menu. Look at all this stuff I want to eat.
Commentary:
This menu is like a scroll of delicious life goals! 😋📜
Love when plans get canceled. It’s like getting a snow day as an adult.
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Is it bad that I start practicing my surprised-but-not-really face every time I make plans? ❄️😅🎉
I love being a pretty woman because it widens the threshold for cringe-worthy things I can say.
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Being a pretty woman is like having a golden ticket to the cringe Olympics! 😂🎟️💃
Love those deep burps that instantly make me feel like I lost 10 lbs.
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Burp therapy: the only weight loss plan I can stick to! 😅🤷♂️🎈
My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.
Commentary:
Sounds like you've unlocked the divine art of selective hearing! 🙉✨
I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.
Commentary:
Irony level: 💎💰 Apply generously… with a side of financial panic! 😂💸