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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

The best proof that fairy tales are fictional is the fact that the prince is always an intelligent and handsome single man.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Single, not sure how to mingle.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

D was probably like “lmao ok” when they named the alphabet the ABCs

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

To cut the long story short, I have spent all my money.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Unlike the stomach, the brain doesn’t alert you when it’s empty.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

What an awful time to be even remotely aware of what is going on in the world.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Going to a DaBaby concert because I need some alone time, and I know no one else will be there.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1823 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,985

Funny Quotes Topics

14,791

Funny Quotes Images

11,985

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,433

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

Freshly posted on Slack:

There’s something so spiritual about new life. When I look my baby nephew in the eyes, I can’t stop thinking about how amazing it will be to connect with him on LinkedIn.

Just landed via Facebook:

Dear resealable chocolate bag, your confidence in my self-control was truly inspiring. And you were delicious.

Spotted on Instagram:

May her tire get flat with a dude who can’t change it.

Freshly posted on X:

I am re-watching “Narcos,” and I have to say that for someone who smokes so much weed, Pablo Escobar gets a lot done.

Trending via TikTok:

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

Shared recently on Threads:

I love when women move on. It’s my favourite genre.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Be the lemon you want the world to hand to others.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I’m gonna need everybody to stop living here.

Shared recently on Messenger:

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1823 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,985

Funny Quotes Topics

14,791

Funny Quotes Images

11,985

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

As an exorcist, whenever I hear of some new poor soul possessed by a demon, all I can think is Ka-Ching!

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

The empty spot in your bed is for snacks, not liars.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

It’s so hot out, I just hydroplaned off the toilet seat at work.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

I enjoy driving because it combines my desire to sit with my talent for being angry.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

And no thanking Jesus unless he actually shows up at the ceremony.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

I’m sorry, but when you call me ‘batshit crazy’ it’s almost starting to sound like you think it’s a bad thing!

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I am brilliantly social for one and a half hours, and then I need to recover in my bedroom cave for two days.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize how quiet your bathroom exhaust fan was.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Seriously, how sexy was Freud’s mom?

Freshly posted on Threads:

I regret to inform you that the secret to appearing well-read is to read.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Cows are very calm, considering the whole floor is food to them.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again because I have a terrible memory.

Seen just now on Messenger:

It’s funny how our brains remember that we have forgotten something, but not what we have forgotten.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

If you drink enough, any bar can be a karaoke bar.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.

Just shared via X:

Look, ice cream has eggs in it, therefore it is a breakfast food.

Seen just now on Discord:

I think the Monday after Sunday should always be a day off.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Remember it’s Christmas. You need to check your elf before you wreck your shelf.

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