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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

When I bark at a dog, I always worry that I might have inadvertently said something wrong.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

She calls me Anthony Bourdain because I eat her parts unknown, no reservations.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

They can steal your recipe, but the sauce won’t taste the same.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

First date idea: you rescue me out of the tree I got stuck in while looking through your windows.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

You want me to go apple picking? The original sin?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Ouija boards are like unannounced phone calls for ghosts.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

767 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,929

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,929

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

There is a house I drive by most days and I can never tell if they are having a yard sale or that is just how they live.

Seen just now on X:

That’s not fat. It’s bonus content.

Just landed via Telegram:

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

Trending via Discord:

Sorry, Mom, I can’t go outside, I’m ugly.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

Going viral on Reddit:

The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both — naked people arguing about politics.

Seen just now on Reddit:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Oh, I shouldn’t worry? Why didn’t I think of that?

Just landed via Slack:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Going viral on Messenger:

Seeing people exercising outside my house really motivated me to get up and close the blinds.

Home » Funny Misday Quotes

Funny misday quotes

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All funny misday quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

767 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,929

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,929

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

If you tell me to make myself at home, I’m going to ask you to leave.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

You have hopes and dreams. I have nopes and screams.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I love diss tracks because it’s basically two dudes going, “grr, we hate each other so much we’re going to take turns writing increasingly personalized poetry!”

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

“How is the job search going?” First of all, that is a violent question. And it hurts me, by the way. And second, how the hell should I know.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

My goal was to look good in a bikini this summer, but the call of the barbecue is stronger.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Getting old is not fun. Sometimes I have to check my texts and photos when someone asks me what I did yesterday.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Most people have 32 teeth. Some have 10. Simple meth.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Going viral on Facebook:

Taking action is my least favorite thing to take.

Just landed via TikTok:

If history is repeating itself, when can I buy a pet dinosaur?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

Spotted on Threads:

A hammock is a terrible place to receive bad news.

Spotted on Telegram:

I’m officially at the age where I hate unnecessary noises and useless friends.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Democracy is a fine thing. The bad thing is that the stupid people are allowed to take part.

Seen just now on Facebook:

The number one rule of Thanksgiving dinner is take your own vehicle so you can leave on your own terms.

Trending via Pinterest:

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

That song stuck in my head is “Don’t Speak”; I have no doubt in my mind.

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