Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Have you ever met the human version of a headache?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

The night before a day off is more satisfying than the actual day off.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Straight man stuns they/them by ordering in fluent woke.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Our childhood photos might be ugly but those smiles were definitely not fake.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Love triangle? You mean this Dorito?

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

It’s crazy that you don’t really argue with a baby for the first year of its life and then you have to argue with the baby every day.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

How many calories do you burn waiting to hear back?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Please don’t ask me what my hobbies are, I lost interest in life back in 6th grade.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,481

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

Whenever I close an app and immediately open it back up, I really feel how dire it all is.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Have nothing to say, I just wanted to appear in your newsfeed.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

A female will ghost you, and the whole time she is waiting for you to text back again.

Live now on TikTok:

I once broke up with a guy because he ate half my french fries, and when I get really lonely, I still think about those french fries.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I love posting my thoughts on the internet. Now they’re your problem.

Live now on Instagram:

In my defense, they burned my grilled cheese sandwich.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

Making waves on LinkedIn:

God’s plan for me is super weird so far.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

Trending via TikTok:

Dating for love isn’t working. Now I’m dating to conduct psychological experiments and collect data.

Funny negative thought quotes

New funny negative thought quotes 👇

They should invent a brain that doesn’t whisper bad things to you.

3 weeks ago

bad, brain, humor, inner, inner voice, invent, invention, mind, negative, negative thought, self-talk, should, things, thought, voice, whisper

All funny negative thought quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I love how spring sprung and then disappeared again.

46 shares on LinkedIn this month:

By the time I remember to text back, it be too disrespectful to even do it.

18 shares on Pinterest this month:

There should be a withering shamrock emoji so that people can express misfortune or Irish grief.

91 shares on X this month:

I’m bringing back “holy moly” and nobody can stop me.

32 shares on Facebook this month:

I love making the whole conversation so awkward that the most anyone can say after is “so yeah…”

82 shares on Messenger this month:

No more ragebaiting around me, please. Let’s try joybaiting, perhaps even lovebaiting.

23 shares on TikTok this month:

Need a professional way to say, “I do not care, don’t mention this to me again.”

24 shares on TikTok this month:

The funniest thing about 28 Years Later is that the rest of the world just went “Uhm, anyway!” and carried on as normal, while the Brits live in hell.

44 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m so talented I can not only spill food on my clothes but I can get it on yours too.

28 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s not about the cards you’re dealt, but how you play the hand you’ve got hidden up your sleeve.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

The fewer the people, the greater the inner peace.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

There is no physical evidence to say that today is Tuesday, we all just have to trust that someone kept count since the first one ever.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Women’s fall fashion is basically coming up with ways to wear a blanket without it looking like you’re wearing a blanket.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

That depressing moment when you start your car to go to work and it doesn’t explode.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

I’m old enough to remember when the hole in the ozone layer killed us all off.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

Free will: where you get to choose your own adventure … and regret it.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

Going viral on TikTok:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Trending via Pinterest:

They should invent a DoorDash but for a kiss goodnight and getting tucked in.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Before social media, you could just completely forget that somebody existed. Good times.

Trending via Discord:

Inventing the Grinch: “Santa needs a Wario!”

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

You seem really unhinged, we should grab coffee sometime.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

If I’m out drinking and “Push It” starts playing, take me home immediately.

Broadcasted on Slack:

The more I use social media, the more I see why children shouldn’t.

Seen just now on YouTube:

It’s really sad that April Fools is the only day people are appropriately skeptical of stuff they read on the internet.

Making waves on Telegram:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny negative thought quotes

New funny negative thought quotes 👇

They should invent a brain that doesn’t whisper bad things to you.

All funny negative thought quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨