Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Let’s go out for carrots sometime.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

They should invent going outside without people looking at you.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Days without shaking my head disapprovingly at myself: 0.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Teaching myself ukulele! Neighbor keeping the beat on my wall!

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

I don’t know when people started calling hot dogs ‘glizzys,’ but I hate it, and you all need to stop immediately.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

You have one week to ask me to be your Valentine. Requests must be in the form of poetic verse written in your blood.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

Why go to the art museum when I can just stare at you?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,474

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

Going viral on Instagram:

Hearing my voice in recording makes me wanna apologize to every person I talked to.

Live now on WhatsApp:

The only person I ever call is my wife, and that’s just when we’re trying to find her phone.

Just landed via Reddit:

Quitting my job to rock around the Christmas tree.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Only a fool would use the toothbrush the dentist gives you. You think the dentist would freely hand you the tools that would keep them away?

Seen just now on Facebook:

Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?

Breaking via LinkedIn:

When the doorbell rings, I always go to the door with my jacket on. Depending on who it is, I either just want to leave or have just come home.

Trending via WeChat:

My therapist is so lucky. I’m like a Netflix Original that pays her to watch.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

Shared recently on YouTube:

The feminine urge to say “ouch” when I bump into things that doesn’t even hurt.

Funny playtime quotes

Funny playtime quotes bring laughter and joy to every moment of fun 🎉🎈 Whether you’re playing with friends, family, or just letting your inner child run wild, these witty and playful sayings add extra sparkle ✨ to your games and hangouts. Get ready to giggle, smile, and share the fun vibes with everyone around you! 😄🎲 Let the good times roll and the laughs never end! 😂🎉

New funny playtime quotes 👇

All funny playtime quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Instagram this month:

The idea that wisdom teeth are just some random glitch that God forgot to patch, so now we have to pull them out with modern technology, is retarded.

28 shares on Discord this month:

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

85 shares on YouTube this month:

Do you guys remember when we had to share one desktop computer wіth the whole famіly?

80 shares on Pinterest this month:

I hate to brag but I excel at my faults.

86 shares on Discord this month:

Slipping into something more comfortable, another dimension.

60 shares on X this month:

I love my bodyguard. I would take a bullet for him.

51 shares on TikTok this month:

Rental car companies seem so insanely helpless at their one job. You show up at the airport, reservation in hand, and they’re like, ‘Wait, really? You wanted a car? Sorry, you totally caught me off guard.’

87 shares on Twitch this month:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

49 shares on Facebook this month:

I talk to myself in the same condescending tone, so you’re not special.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

God saw you do that.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Some people identify as funnier than they actually are.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and retweet if you agree.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Just drafted the drunk text I’m going to send after one drink this weekend.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Relationships are actually easy when you’re not dating a lying weirdo.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My entire life changed once I found out that a crush is just a lack of information.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,611

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

My watch battery is fully charged. So I got some time.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Lord, they down here giving us bills every month after you already paid the price.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Why is it that your clothes only get caught on the door handle when you’re in a bad mood?

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Porn actresses envy the look on my face when I clean my ear with a cotton bud.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

They should build a separate grocery store for people who have actually purchased food before, know how to push a cart, and possess at least an ounce of spatial awareness.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Just blocked all the normal people, so if you see this… sup, weirdo.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

I wait all week for the weekend just to aggressively do nothing in five different outfits.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I pray this boy wins in life. I wanna see him on top of me.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

The paintings I always like the most in museums are the ones that have a bench.

Breaking via Slack:

There is nothing an orgasm can’t fix, I have researched it extensively.

Seen just now on Slack:

Called in, “Hey, macarena!” this morning.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

We can’t both age regress at the same time — someone’s gonna have to push me on the swingset.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Why is everyone mean to the kindest people for absolutely no reason?

Shared recently on Threads:

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

Just shared via Messenger:

The algorithm knows about that thing you like that you’re denying yourself of.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I’m not scared of love, I’m scared of insufficient cash.

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