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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

First they give you butterflies, then mental health problems.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

All the things I like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

I love my cat, but I hope in her next life she’s reincarnated as the owner of a very whiny cat.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

My sister: snowboards. My brother: skateboards. Me: charcuterie boards.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Apart from “It’s okay”, what other death threats do women use?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Big fan of taking a huge bite and then nodding while I chew. You make an excellent point, food.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

People have ex girlfriends, I have ex crushes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

Updated

59 minutes ago

Users Online

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WhatsApp:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Spotted on Telegram:

Got fired from my job at the zoo because I kept trying to wax the turtles.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

God, please — if you don’t want someone to love me, at least make me a millionaire.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

There’s a disconnect between the decibel level of my car singing and my talent.

Making waves on X:

Meetings are great because who doesn’t like being held hostage?

Live now on Twitch:

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

Just shared via Threads:

My dogs have learned that whenever they hear the f-word in the kitchen, there’s now food on the floor.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Just told my kids it’s illegal to have the light on while we’re driving. I will not break this cycle.

Just landed via Snapchat:

People always ask me why there’s a chair in my shower. Who the hell eats breakfast standing up?

Making waves on Discord:

Vegan zombies be like: GRAINS!

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology think time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

760 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,922

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,922

Updated

59 minutes ago

Users Online

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

I finally became a butterfly, and everyone’s already asking what’s next.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Cartoons make it look like getting stabbed in the butt with a pitchfork would be no big deal, but I beg to differ.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Halloween pumpkins look even scarier if you just use the ones from last year.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Cigarette smell gotta be one of the worst smells in the history of smells.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

“Careful. It’s slippery!” – Everyone, after you’ve already slipped.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

The cashier said, “Have a good day,” but she doesn’t mean it.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Gotta find someone you’re thermostatically compatible with. You can’t be a 74 dating a 62.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on WeChat:

I wanna meet the person whose parents are super disappointed he went to medical school instead of becoming a stand-up comedian.

Making waves on Facebook:

I hope this email keeps you awake at night.

Trending via Threads:

People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

Seen just now on Messenger:

How do you tell someone that you will probably end up marrying them, but in a casual way?

Just shared via Messenger:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

Trending via Reddit:

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

Just shared via Threads:

I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.

Just landed via Facebook:

It whistles, doesn’t it? Your head when it’s windy.

Seen just now on Threads:

I like people who make me forget that I’m shy.

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