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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

If you’re going to be weird, be confident about it.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

That’s not my girl bestie, that’s my platonic wife.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Deciding if I should heal or just give up and go completely insane.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

My mom always used to tell me that I look cute when I sleep. My boss has a different opinion.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Since there are no other Vulcans on the enterprise and the crew has no comparison, Spock could be and probably is bullshitting them most of the time.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Just saying “Think about it!” is enough to overwhelm many people these days.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,596

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

Just saw two identical twins out in public together. No disrespect to that lifestyle but please keep it private.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

An alcoholic morning show host becoming Secretary of War is some Kurt Vonnegut shit.

Seen just now on Twitch:

If there is a God and He “loves” us, then explain snakes.

Making waves on YouTube:

I’m naturally funny because my life is a joke.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

Just shared via Messenger:

Age ceases to be just a number everytime the airline announces seating queue priority.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

For Halloween, I wanna be loved.

Seen just now on Threads:

Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I love saying “exactly” to stuff that doesn’t make sense.

Funny rant quotes

Funny rant quotes are the perfect way to vent with a side of humor 😆🔥 Whether you’re fed up with everyday annoyances or just need a laugh, these witty bursts of frustration turn grumbles into giggles 😂💬 Get ready to embrace the chaos and find joy in the little rants that keep life entertaining! 🎉🙌

New funny rant quotes 👇

All funny rant quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Threads this month:

When it rains in New York, the train starts smelling like hamster.

73 shares on Pinterest this month:

Moment of silence for those who received mugs that aren’t microwave- and dishwasher-safe.

35 shares on Facebook this month:

How do couples who live together get anything done? I wouldn’t leave my bed if my girlfriend was in it.

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

91 shares on Reddit this month:

Me drinking green tea: this is going to fix everything.

96 shares on WeChat this month:

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

100 shares on Reddit this month:

There will never be a perfect time. Make that mistake now.

80 shares on Pinterest this month:

Guns N’ Roses: “Welcome to the jungle!” The jungle: “No more humans, please!”

66 shares on Facebook this month:

“American Pope” sounds like the name of an Amazon prime original series you ignore.

10 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My grandad fought Germans on the beaches of Normandy. This was last summer and it was very embarrassing.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Problems are like balls. Everyone thinks they have bigger ones than you.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Mike is short for Micycle.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

The only thing I gained this year is weight.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing bad can happen while you’re under a blanket. Just remember that.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Plot twist: a Mission Impossible movie where the mission is in fact impossible.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Sunday is my favorite day to invent new things to worry about.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I treat people the way I want to be treated by not leaving the house.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Only money has the right to say “you’ll regret losing me”. The rest of you calm down.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,612

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

The fine art of sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I’m planning to save money on Christmas gifts this year by wrapping up all the toys my toddler dropped behind the couch.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you miss your wife enough.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

“Why are you so quiet?” Because I’m barely even here.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Twitter is cool because you can figure out what’s going on in the world through memes instead of watching the news.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

The time I spend, just thinking about food, is kind of embarrassing.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

The amount of family secrets you uncover as you get older is wild.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

My dog sets an impossible bar for how I should greet my wife when she comes home.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I love being home and doing absolutely nothing and never contributing to society.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Y’all liking my posts feels like a little forehead kiss.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I try not to laugh at my own jokes, but we all know I’m hilarious.

Trending via Pinterest:

Nike: Just Do It! Me: I don’t want to.

Just shared via Instagram:

Ironically jogging pants are mostly worn by the laziest people.

Live now on Instagram:

That moment the doorbell rings and you tip toe to the window pretending you’re not home.

Seen just now on Threads:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this Thanksgiving party started.

Freshly posted on Threads:

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

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