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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

And is this “year-end bonus” in the room with us right now?

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

I lied, there’s no sex. I just need you to change the batteries in my smoke detectors.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

All the clouds have come out to play today.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Perhaps moths don’t seek the light, but are simply fleeing the darkness.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Hell hath no fury like a toddler getting his nose wiped.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

My eye doctor is alarmingly young and when he said he thought I had a chalazion or a hordoleum, I thought he might be referencing Pokémon.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Not to brag, but I don’t fight with people on the internet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,663

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I think you misunderstood – when I said, “Let me look into it,” that meant, “I don’t know exactly how to tell you no just yet.”

Going viral on Instagram:

As a kid, I was worried about randomly disappearing into the Bermuda Triangle forever. As an adult, I’m wondering how I can actually make that happen.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

No more ragebaiting around me, please. Let’s try joybaiting, perhaps even lovebaiting.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I am a fool everyday, I don’t need a holiday for it.

Making waves on Reddit:

If life was a video game, right now would be the time where I randomly press buttons because I don’t know what to do.

Spotted on Facebook:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet.

Making waves on TikTok:

I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

Funny rant quotes

Funny rant quotes are the perfect way to vent with a side of humor 😆🔥 Whether you’re fed up with everyday annoyances or just need a laugh, these witty bursts of frustration turn grumbles into giggles 😂💬 Get ready to embrace the chaos and find joy in the little rants that keep life entertaining! 🎉🙌

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All funny rant quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on Facebook this month:

I recently saw a documentary about dinosaurs. They simply ate everyone they didn’t like. I like that concept.

70 shares on Discord this month:

I’d be really slim if it wasn’t for birthdays, anniversaries, Easter, Christmas, Mother’s Day, weekends and me.

54 shares on Facebook this month:

ROMO (relief of missing out)

60 shares on Messenger this month:

I love spending my parents’ money, they must pay for bringing me into this world.

63 shares on Threads this month:

“Inconvenience is the cost of community,” I repeat to myself as I climb six flights of stairs for my friend’s birthday party for her cat.

50 shares on X this month:

I just really hope The Weeknd’s real name isn’t Mnday.

19 shares on Reddit this month:

Japanese cats answering the phone be like, “Meowshi meowshi.”

32 shares on Snapchat this month:

We are all just prisoners here of our phone device.

46 shares on Reddit this month:

FaceTiming me is for platinum members only.

43 shares on Threads this month:

Don’t ring my doorbell unless you’re accompanied by a camera crew and holding balloons and a big check.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but no one in the world is judging you as much as you’re judging yourself. People online: Hold my beer.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Being a little freak is my love language.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I really hope that I look like the mirror version of me, and not the camera version.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I need an Apple Watch that tracks when my patience runs out.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

No one is excited to see me in shorts except mosquitoes.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

What a lot of people don’t understand about mountain climbing is that don’t do that.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing worse than when I turn up to Park Run to find it is indeed going ahead.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,756

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

The rule should be: if you can smell the cookout, you’re invited to the cookout.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Who called them cat allergies and not meowlergies?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Transgender ambulance driver whose pronouns are we/you/we/you/we/you.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Never share a secret with a clock. Because time will tell.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

I may not have lost all my marbles yet, but there’s a small hole in the bag somewhere.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

I would like to see the USA go metric before I die, just so I can enjoy the outrage that would follow.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

The smaller the woman, the bigger the attitude. It’s science.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Nobody watches you harder than people who don’t like you, so give them a show they will never forget.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Making waves on Reddit:

On my phone, you’ll never see contacts saved as ‘babe’ or ‘love.’ I save full names—first and last—like a government office.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I don’t understand construction. Like, how do they know what to do next?

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

Shared recently on Threads:

Mice after a breakup be like “we are not on squeaking terms”.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

Live now on X:

My cat’s in a bad mood, despite eating and sleeping all day.

Live now on Discord:

When pregnant women are around, watch what you say. Nowadays, anything will be used as a name.

Live now on TikTok:

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

Trending via Slack:

Do people exist who manage to wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry in the same day?

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