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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

As a woman, you need to forgive yourself for men you entertained when you had low self-esteem.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Dogs have two jobs: calm their humans when they are stressed. Stress their humans when they are calm.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

People always say, “There’s plenty of fish in the sea” … yeah, but I’ve got my eye fixed on that specific, emotionally distant salmon who has commitment issues.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

Children are so giving. For example, my kids gave me a cold.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

I’m instantly 70% nicer after 3 p.m. on Fridays.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

The worst is when it’s too late to take a nap but too early to go to bed.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Professor: Most of you won’t pass this course. Me: Cool, so you’re like, real shitty at your job.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Mentally, I’m in a forest screaming. Physically, I’m answering emails with a fake smile and clenched jaw.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

A general rule of parenting: if you’re having a great day, the day isn’t old enough yet.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Twitch:

It’s so peaceful when you have no interest in other people’s business.

Breaking via Telegram:

In university, you can literally tell who had no freedom at home.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I’m buysexual, you buy me food, I become sexual.

Making waves on TikTok:

Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.

Making waves on WeChat:

Once you realize that no one really cares how you’re doing, it becomes much easier to answer the question.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Release that sexual frustration, get a burger.

Seen just now on Discord:

I can already feel that the day is going to seize me instead of the other way around.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I like to swear a lot so that people will keep their kids away from me.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Life hack: you don’t need salt if you just cry into your dinner.

Just landed via Threads:

Why is everyone mean to the kindest people for absolutely no reason?

Funny sexting quotes

New funny sexting quotes 👇

Can’t be sexting when you’re somewhat articulate. You just sound like a vampire.

0

2 months ago

articulate, communication, humor, just, sexting, sound, texting, vampire

Someone from 🇬🇧 has recently copied this quote.

21 shares on YouTube this month.
Sexting is hilarious, when you think about it. Like, this email truly should’ve been a meeting.

0

2 months ago

communication, email, hilarious, humor, meeting, sexting, think, truly

Someone from 🇲🇼 has recently bookmarked this quote.

20 shares on TikTok this month.

All funny sexting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Facebook this month:

I concern myself with the opinions of sheep because they are cute.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m the kind of introvert who dodges phone calls but sends paragraphs in texts.

89 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Jan 1st: Avocado on whole grain toast with a protein shake. Jan 20th: Syrup comes from a tree so technically it’s a vegetable.

40 shares on WeChat this month:

Just did several sets of some bullshit at the gym… no idea which muscles have been targeted.

21 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ll be like “it is what it is” and almost vomit from anxiety.

71 shares on Instagram this month:

I just learned the professional way to say “I told you so”: “This was identified early on as a likely outcome.”

16 shares on Facebook this month:

Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.

35 shares on TikTok this month:

I never thought I would say this, and it took me a while to come to terms, but I think I ate too much bacon.

62 shares on TikTok this month:

Whoops, lost myself for about eight years there.

53 shares on WhatsApp this month:

A middle finger hits different when your nails are done.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

You could be having a nice day and then somebody your own age says they bought a house.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I grew up in a really small town. The closest thing we had to food delivery was someone egging your house.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

As a retiree, I have two pairs of pajamas. Bedtime and daytime. Sometimes I get them confused.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

I can’t wait to buy Chanel bags on a random Tuesday for me and my friends.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Sometimes I feel useless but then I remember I breath out carbon dioxide for plants.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

My mental health walks make my mental health worse because I live in a shithole.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

I miss when men had big hair, louder feelings, and leaned over cars to declare their love.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I’ve been having a rough day for about 5 years now.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

I’m pretty sure my husband’s favorite sound is the oven range fan turning on when I start making dinner.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Messenger:

A political guy who supports communism because he hates applying for jobs and just wants to be assigned somewhere.

Trending via Pinterest:

In a parallel universe, I go to bed early and wake up fresh and unstoppable.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Turns out strange women lying in ponds distributing swords was a better basis for a system of government actually.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Parents become grandparents and lose all their senses. All of a sudden, they got McDonald’s money now.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Took my car to the mechanic because it was making a terrible noise. He removed the Mariah Carey Christmas CD, and now it’s fine.

Breaking via Telegram:

Today’s the day I’m gonna’ make the onions cry.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Maybe in another life, I’m a spoiled nepo baby — jobless and doing nothing but shopping all day with my equally nepotised friends.

Just shared via Slack:

Shoutout to everyone who can’t keep up with the laundry or the dishes but decided it was a great idea to start gardening.

Making waves on Slack:

I taught my kids about democracy tonight by having them vote on which movie to watch and pizza to order. I then picked the movie and pizza because I’m the one with the money.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny sexting quotes

New funny sexting quotes 👇

Can’t be sexting when you’re somewhat articulate. You just sound like a vampire.

Sexting is hilarious, when you think about it. Like, this email truly should’ve been a meeting.

All funny sexting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨