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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

*Pointing at a mothers shrieking baby* Is this guy bothering you?

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

I am a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Who called it a period tracker instead of a madvent calendar?

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Reading for pleasure implies the existence of reading for pain. They’re calling it a PhD.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Hey (with the intention of making your fries my fries).

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

A haunted house but in every room someone is asking you to say a little something about yourself.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

There must be an invisible mechanism on my book. Every time I open it, my husband starts trying to talk to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via X:

I always imagined WWIII would be Earth vs. aliens.

Trending via Reddit:

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

Live now on Discord:

Currently into monogamous friendships. If you have other friends, please don’t talk to me, it hurts my heart.

Live now on X:

Can’t wait to put up holiday lights so life can be equally crappy but festively so.

Spotted on Instagram:

And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

Making waves on Snapchat:

British people never go downstairs; they just jump out of a window and open an umbrella like Mary Poppins.

Just shared via Instagram:

My fairytale would be called the princess and the pea sized bladder.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Stop blaming everyone for your problems. Pick one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

How long do you actually have to wear a muscle shirt until you get muscles?

Just shared via Telegram:

I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,953

Funny Quotes Topics

14,758

Funny Quotes Images

11,953

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,431

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

Remember, when asking for a raise, it is considered customary to be sober.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Don’t talk to me unless you are a ham sandwich.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

Saturday nights are for watching zombie shows and dreaming about the apocalypse.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

I am writing a book about reverse psychology. Please don’t buy it.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Nothing ruins my day quite like getting out of bed and dealing with people.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

My housemates are convinced our house is haunted. I’ve lived here for 274 years and not noticed anything strange.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

Duolingo should have an “I’m going on holiday to this place very soon” setting so it teaches you “can I have the bill” and so on instead of “the cow boils an egg”.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Twitter is great because you can get good life advice from other emotionally unstable adults.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

If I were a bird, I know who I’d poop on.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

“Fries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on WeChat:

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

Freshly posted on YouTube:

You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Does anyone else stare at the dead body in movies to see if you can catch them breathing?

Making waves on Discord:

I need a weighted blanket that won’t let me get out of bed in the morning.

Trending via Snapchat:

Marriages are like pancakes. Sometimes you gotta throw the first one out.

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m a pocket full of sunshine, not your dumping ground for grumpiness.

Spotted on Facebook:

Love is like a bird. Sometimes flying around me but then moving on.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Double chins are better than double faces.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

Just shared via TikTok:

Smile like a monkey with a new banana.

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