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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Shooting a gun in the air to get everyone’s attention, then immediately getting shy and sheepishly twisting my shoe in the dirt and blinking bashfully.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

My only addiction is coffee, which is just like crack but is legal and tastes good.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

If someone asks you: ‘Why are you single, don’t you like people?’, answer: ‘Why aren’t you a millionaire, don’t you like money?’

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

The longer I stay home, the more homeless I look.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever watched the teams you hate be first-round exits?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I don’t rise and shine. I caffeinate and hope.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

I secretly want you to say no when I offer you some of my cake.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,653

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

Going viral on YouTube:

Parallel parking: where true relationships are tested!

Making waves on Slack:

Sorry for being late, I was enjoying my last few minutes of not being here.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Welcome to the internet, where people are confidently wrong all the time.

Just shared via TikTok:

The Bloodhound Gang were very special because its music for 12-year-old boys, but every reference requires you to be 40 years old.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Is it better to beat someone to the punch or punch someone to the beat?

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Cafeteria is a beautiful name for a baby girl.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Dear people, who drive without music playing, what do you do with your brain?

Making waves on Reddit:

Maybe I’ll quit so I can focus on summer.

Funny soft launch quotes

New funny soft launch quotes 👇

All funny soft launch quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on Telegram this month:

That Coldplay CEO guy was held more accountable than the president.

16 shares on TikTok this month:

Welcome to your senior years, where you get mad when they rearrange the grocery store.

61 shares on Reddit this month:

For financial reasons, I will be passing away.

55 shares on Snapchat this month:

Horror movies have ruined the joy of skinny-dipping for me.

25 shares on Slack this month:

Skinning your knee as an adult is so humiliating. That’s the toddler injury.

32 shares on Instagram this month:

The closer you are to nature, the further you are from idiots.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

My favorite part of leaving the house is looking forward to going home.

52 shares on Facebook this month:

I like to be alone a lot; it’s nothing personal.

51 shares on Telegram this month:

My wife is refusing to bring me a beer. That’s it, gonna text her and say “I cannot believe how lazy you are”.

75 shares on Reddit this month:

We went out on a boat to see whales and the crew encouraged us to clap and cheer for the whales and boo at the regular fish.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Apparently, throwing the remote against the wall didn’t help recharging the batteries.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

God: “I told you to love thy neighbor – not start trade wars with them.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Fundamentally, I understand chess, because I too would never let my king feel unsafe.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My mom didn’t raise a fool. Possibly a psycho, but never a fool.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I love replying to people within seconds. Hello. I am here. Always.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Learning to be Alpha from YouTube.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s not a competition, but if it was I would win.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Finally my winter fat has gone. I now have spring rolls.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The length of a LinkedIn Post is directly proportional to the amount of bullshit in it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,596

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

If you innocently act like you don’t know, people will explain dirty words to you and it’s hilarious.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Therapy is basically me saying, “I did a thing,” and my therapist saying, “Yay, good job!”

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

The guy who drills the holes so you can assemble IKEA furniture is clearly having problems at home.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Tired of looking at a bad screen. Can’t wait to get home and look at a good screen.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

You could be having a nice day and then somebody your own age says they bought a house.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

I could put my keys in the same spot every day, but why deprive myself of a treasure hunt that makes me late.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

I’m sorry I used air quotes when I said we were friends.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

Done with work today. The work day isn’t over, I’m just done with it.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

You have hopes and dreams. I have nopes and screams.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

I don’t always whoop, but when I do, there it is.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

I get it, drug commercials. I too like to dance while I describe all my side effects.

Going viral on Messenger:

Take your days off, these jobs don’t care about you.

Trending via Slack:

As highly as it’s esteemed, the Mayo Clinic still sounds like the place sick sandwiches go to get better.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

This year has gone by so quick. Christmas is basically tomorrow.

Live now on YouTube:

My dream is to buy a horse and race it. The horse will probably beat me but it’ll still be fun.

Just landed via WeChat:

I feel like whoever named them rice cakes has never actually eaten a cake.

Making waves on Instagram:

Carrying my phone from room to room like a Victorian woman and her lantern.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I like to be alone a lot; it’s nothing personal.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I was googling about the best time to visit the Maldives. It’s when you have money.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Seaweed is great for when you want to eat pure salt but wish it had the texture of slime.

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