Commentary:
When I was 7, walking it off was considered a life-saving procedure 😂👍 #ResilienceSkills
Funny soft quotes
If you’re soft, don’t come to my house, cause my kids will roast you.
Commentary:
Sounds like your kids skipped the school of hard knocks and went straight to Comedy Central 🏠🔥😂
Forget hot girl summer, it’s rot girl summer (laying in bed, reading books, laying under layers of soft blankets).
Commentary:
Sounds like a cozy summer transformation! Who needs a tan when you can have a comforter tan? 🛌📚☕️#RotGirlSummer
Self-care is putting your face on a very soft cat.
Commentary:
"BRB, testing if my cat is a certified spa treatment! 😹🧖♀️🐱 #FurRealRelaxation"
I’ve got a soft heart and a savage mouth. I’m like a Hallmark card written by Gordon Ramsay.
Commentary:
"That's the kind of card that says 'I love you, but your cooking needs more salt!' 💌🥄🔥"
Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”
Commentary:
Well, talk about emotional baggage with your snacks! 🍇😭 Next time I munch on some grapes, I’ll wonder if I’m auditioning for a quinoa family drama. 🍇🎭 Who knew fruit could be so H O T! 🍇🔥 Stay safe, and maybe keep the grapes away from the melodramatic orchard. 😉
But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?
Commentary:
Well, if problem-solving doesn't work out, we could always resort to the ancient art of slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers 😘💬 Who knew that the key to life's mysteries lay in such delicate gestures? 😉
Soft launching your call out the next day by telling everyone at work your stomach feels a little weird.
Commentary:
"Well, excuse me while I dial up some drama for tomorrow! 📞🤢 Can't wait to see the reactions when I 'soft launch' my call out the 'stomach bug' way. Your move, stomach… Your move. 🤣 #SneakyCallOutStrategies"
I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.
Commentary:
When you wake up smelling like a spa and your pillow's living its best life 🍬💤✨
Why is sleeping at night so hard, but sleeping in the morning is like drifting away on a soft, fluffy cloud while Adele sings you a lullaby?
Commentary:
Morning sleep is like a VIP concert with Adele, while nighttime is just karaoke with my alarm clock as the vocalist. 😴🎤⏰