Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m super lazy today. It’s like normal lazy but I’m wearing a cape.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Could you even imagine the crime rate if no one drank coffee or ate bacon.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Hate when anxiety gives me stomach problems. Like, baby, you are supposed to be a mental disorder, please stay in your line.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

They say the human body is 60% water, but after extensive observation of my husband and son, I’d like to submit a revision to the data. Those two are at least 50% wind.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Kind of miraculous how much love can be summoned and how much your day can be improved by just looking at an animal and saying stuff in a weird voice.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Everything is 10 times funnier when you are supposed to be quiet.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

You’re over 35. Better go pee before you leave, pee when you get there, pee while you’re there, and pee before you leave.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

Not many quicksand-related deaths since the 1970s. Thank God the authorities got that nightmare under control.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Presumably, if you had a time machine, you could just kill young adult Hitler. The baby part seems gratuitous.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

The sound of rain outside when you’re in bed is elite.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,269

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I want to be rich enough where I’m not offended by the price of beef jerky.

Breaking via Instagram:

1pm, the perfect time to start doing the work I woke up early to get a jump on.

Seen just now on Slack:

A garlic a day keeps people away.

Going viral on Messenger:

All soups are gazpacho if you’re lazy enough.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Pilot is one of the few jobs where you can get fired for going above and beyond.

Just landed via Reddit:

Raisins also have wrinkles and are still sweet.

Broadcasted on Threads:

You’re my least favourite notification.

Trending via Snapchat:

I say “long story short,” and suddenly we’re in Act III with an intermission.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Some Uber rides in NYC are the same price as a JetBlue flight to Miami.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Nothing has improved the quality of my life more than living beyond my means.

Funny solo activity quotes

New funny solo activity quotes 👇

Self-care is smoking a solo blunt with music.

0

1 day ago

activity, blunt, music, relaxation, self-care, smoking, solo, solo activity

Fresh post – no country stats yet.

Social activity data coming soon…
Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

0

2 months ago

activity, actually, alone, alone time, care, eat, eating, eating out, ever, going, me, me time, most, peace, peaceful, relaxation, self, self-care, shopping, solo, solo activity, therapy, things, time, yourself

Someone from 🇰🇬 has recently copied this quote.

106 shares on X this month.
That’s me in the corner eating Nutella with a spoon.

0

2 months ago

activity, comfort, comfort food, corner, eating, food, humor, indulgence, me, Nutella, solo, solo activity, spoon

Someone from 🇰🇳 has recently copied this quote.

77 shares on X this month.

All funny solo activity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Messenger this month:

Maybe in another universe, I punched him in the face instead of staying quiet.

81 shares on Snapchat this month:

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

59 shares on TikTok this month:

“23 and Me” is how Leonardo DiCaprio RSVPs for events.

18 shares on YouTube this month:

Of course, I also put my mobile down from time to time. For example, when someone tries to call me.

98 shares on Facebook this month:

Parents become grandparents and lose all their senses. All of a sudden, they got McDonald’s money now.

46 shares on Threads this month:

My whole life is basically a blooper reel.

62 shares on Messenger this month:

For your own sanity, always take mixed signals as a no.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

Pleasantly surprised to discover the treadmill I bought came with a remote control, so I can run it from my recliner.

30 shares on Facebook this month:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

Money saved by using public transport instead of an Uber is paid for with your time and mental health instead.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Reverse cowgirl because first dates are awkward.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

My goal was to look good in a bikini this summer, but the call of the barbecue is stronger.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

Calling someone a “tough cookie” isn’t a compliment, tough cookies are literally the worst cookies.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

I had a hard time coping with the divorce. I’m fine now, but at first I was almost crazy with joy.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Sorry, I can’t tonight. I’m busy taking things personally.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Big city friend is complaining about a 10 minute wait for a subway while I sit here waiting for the rail replacement horse.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Toxic girlfriend who goes through her boyfriend’s calculator app and asks why he’s doing the equations he’s doing.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Stay an extra hour in the office and no one cares. Arrive a few minutes late and everyone loses their minds.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The great thing about having pet insurance is that while our dachshund is at the vets, they’ve given us a courtesy poodle to hang out with.

Broadcasted on Slack:

There should be bloopers at the end of horror films to relax the viewer before sleeping.

Just landed via Discord:

You know you’re over 40 when you clean your house to the music you used to get drunk to.

Seen just now on WeChat:

When you thought something would be easy peasy lemon squeezy, but it’s actually been stressy, depressy, lemon zesty.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Multitask? I can barely unitask.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

This year has been the perfect blend between me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Just shared via WeChat:

Sometimes after sex, I wonder what it would be like to have sex as a couple.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny solo activity quotes

New funny solo activity quotes 👇

Self-care is smoking a solo blunt with music.

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

That’s me in the corner eating Nutella with a spoon.

All funny solo activity quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨