Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever taken an afternoon nap on the couch?

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I postpone certain outfits until I get a certain hairstyle because, yes, it’s that deep.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

I love when lashes make me look evil.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

I called the cops on my own party once because I was ready to go to bed.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

How does spaghetti know that I’m wearing light-colored clothes?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Whenever you are feeling down, remember you’re the sperm that won.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

I’m pretending to be a hot girl on Tinder so I can match with my roommate and tell him I’m coming over, so he’ll clean the apartment.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,507

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

Grant me the supernatural ability to change the things I cannot accept.

Just shared via YouTube:

The dude who invented the autocorrect has died. Restaurant in piece.

Just shared via WeChat:

Welcome to your 40s. You now pay for 7 streaming services, only use 4 and can’t remember the password to any of them.

Just landed via Reddit:

What did people do before eyeglasses, like half the world just walked around not being able to see?

Breaking via X:

Don’t talk to me about regrets if you’ve never had someone’s name tattooed on you.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Every family needs a delusional daughter who is ambitious about relieving all her family’s struggles solely by winning the lottery one day.

Trending via Pinterest:

“You have reached your monthly article limit,” – a website you’ve never accessed before today.

Just shared via Reddit:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves while he does.

Spotted on Facebook:

Coffee: Because without it I would be a serious danger to society.

Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Girls at the mall: *touches clothes* 🛍️❤️ 'This is cute, this is cute, oh so cute…my bank account disagrees' 😂💸 #ShoppingStruggles"

activity, actually, clothes, cute, fashion, fun, fun activity, girls, humor, just, round, saying, shop, shopping, touching, walk

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’ve heard so much about the “Eye of the Tiger,” but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters?

0

2 months ago

ever, eye, four, humor, joke, letter, letters, much, tiger, wordplay
I love jogging in this heat, cause the sweat hides my tears.

0

2 months ago

cause, disguise, emotional, emotional pain, exercise, heat, humor, i, jogging, love, pain, sweat, tear, tears
Pilots lowkey have an aura when they walk past you in the airport.

0

2 months ago

airport, aura, humor, observation, past, personality, pilot, travel, walk
Occupation: the ugly friend!

0

2 months ago

friend, humor, occupation, relationship, self-deprecation, ugly
I drink so much coffee, people feel jittery when they see a picture of me.

0

2 months ago

addiction, caffeine, coffee, drink, humor, i, jittery, me, people, personality, picture
Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.

0

2 months ago

bag, before, burger, casual, casual joke, fast, fast food, five, Five Guys, food, food service, got, guy, guys, humor, job, joke, just, put, service, workplace

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

67 shares on WeChat this month:

Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am at work.

24 shares on Messenger this month:

I used to be cool and now I say things like “It’s so loud in here, I can’t hear myself think”.

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

Bears and worms have almost nothing in common. But gummy bears and gummy worms? Very similar.

21 shares on Messenger this month:

Man, you really don’t appreciate not having something in your eye until you have something in your eye.

90 shares on Pinterest this month:

So many true crime podcasts are just like “a young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned”

20 shares on Facebook this month:

Spongebob wouldn’t even mess with some of y’all. But he’d hang out with me because my heart is pure, and I like to laugh a lot.

17 shares on Pinterest this month:

Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.

42 shares on YouTube this month:

Getting out of a sports bra looks like it should be a professional women’s sport.

44 shares on Discord this month:

I love dogs with human names because you get to say things like Bob pooped on the rug again.

64 shares on Discord this month:

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

The Epstein client list but to the tune of Mambo number 5.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

If a door closes, you can just open it again. That is a door. Doors work like this.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

Have nothing to say, I just wanted to appear in your newsfeed.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

November moving quicker than two lesbians who met three days ago.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

Just accidentally closed a tab I’ve had been meaning to read for the past 2 years.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

Only money has the right to say “you’ll regret losing me”. The rest of you calm down.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Dollar Tree needs to just go ahead and rename it to A Couple Dollars.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Not photogenic, but I probably look soooo good as a distant memory.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

They should invent a word for when you’re alive but not really living.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

I’m drinking coffee so I don’t say mean things to you. You’re welcome.

Live now on Discord:

We should thank heaven for nipples. Without them boobs would be pointless.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

All my bills say “Outstanding.” I guess I am good to go.

Just shared via Messenger:

I wonder how many calories I can burn petting my cat.

Making waves on Slack:

I don’t mean to brag, but I can forget what I’m saying while I’m saying it.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Making waves on Facebook:

Stop trying to be liked by everybody. You don’t even like everybody.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

Live now on Slack:

My search history is filled with me googling regular words just to make sure I’m using them right.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I’ve heard so much about the “Eye of the Tiger,” but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters?

I love jogging in this heat, cause the sweat hides my tears.

Pilots lowkey have an aura when they walk past you in the airport.

Occupation: the ugly friend!

I drink so much coffee, people feel jittery when they see a picture of me.

Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨