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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

I assume my soulmate has sold his soul to the devil.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

After a vacation, I usually return to work with a fresh, reenergized hatred for my job.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

The real miracle is how Jesus managed to book a table for twenty-six people on the night before the Easter holiday, and then only half them showed up.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Is there really anything worse than being forced to watch a video on someone else’s phone and having to pretend to laugh for 2 minutes?

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Establish dominance at work by drinking iced tea in a wine glass.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

If at first you don’t succeed then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

When phones were tied with wires, people were free. Now that phones are wireless, people are tied.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Yes, I’d love to learn your family card game. I’m sure it won’t be excruciating at all.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,569

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

What’s my net worth? Buddy, I don’t own a net.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

The paintings I always like the most in museums are the ones that have a bench.

Going viral on Telegram:

In general, I like company, but not when I am with my pizza.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Bought a pair of night vision goggles so that I can easily find the fridge at night without waking my wife.

Just shared via Facebook:

What is it called when you’re smart but everything you do is freaking stupid?

Spotted on WeChat:

Are you http? Because I’m :// without you.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Please do not ask a bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

If you’re cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and continue to participate in family game night.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

Playful text about finding love without dating apps or leaving home, humorously desperate.
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Commentary:
Ah, the eternal struggle of the modern recluse on a quest for love! 🕵️‍♂️🚪 Who needs dating apps when you've got the mystery of the unknown neighbor next door or the dashing delivery person who brings your takeout? 🌮💌 Remember, romance can be found in the unlikeliest of places… like the laundry room or the self-checkout line at the grocery store! 🧺🛒 Just remember to

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on X this month:

Women swear they be broke… Then, all of a sudden, here comes that Shein delivery.

12 shares on Reddit this month:

Normalize throwing lamps at people who need to lighten up.

62 shares on TikTok this month:

You don’t have to check your Spotify Wrapped, you are the most played this year.

82 shares on Twitch this month:

Weed smokers be like, “Hold up — before we go to the store, I have to get scared.”

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I can’t go to war, I have to water my plants.

28 shares on Telegram this month:

Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

11 shares on Reddit this month:

Beginning to understand why deer throw themselves in front of cars.

45 shares on Twitch this month:

My favorite part about being sick is when you sneeze with a cough drop in your mouth and it launches across the room like a cruise missile.

58 shares on Messenger this month:

That’s not my girl bestie, that’s my platonic wife.

36 shares on Telegram this month:

Life is like a box of chocolates. More expensive than I was expecting.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

You misunderstood me. I said I was a “bawler,” not a “baller.” You know, someone who cries a lot.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m soirée for my mispronunciation of French words.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The main reason for stress is the daily contact with idiots.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

When you get angry, take a breath and count to ten. Throw a punch at eight. Nobody expects that.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Did the people you had a crush on always like you back or are you funny?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

ADHD is: being pretty good at basically anything you want to be, and absolutely terrible at anything you need to do to live.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Are you mad at me? Have you been mad at me? Will you be mad at me? When will you be mad at me?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Fun fact: The confetti you’ll see in Times Square tonight was made from one CVS receipt.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,470

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

One thing that could really “level-up” the experience of being a pedestrian would be if cars had some kind of feature that could indicate whether or not they were going to turn in a particular direction.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

If you say “Excellent choice” after somebody selects a floor in an elevator, you can usually get a pity laugh.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

You can tell a lot about a person by breaking into their home and going through their belongings.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Having a crush is so fun, it’s literally just butterflies and delusion.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Unpopular opinion: a honeymoon is more needed 5 to 10 years down the road, versus right after getting married.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Men are very good at being women lately.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

Me, whenever I can easily do some yoga pose, “This can’t be right.”

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Parents will give you a lecture about fake friends and then get scammed by their own siblings.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WhatsApp:

I really feel like we need to have more fun in life, because literally nothing matters.

Just shared via Facebook:

Some people are living proof that brain failure does not immediately lead to death.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I truly wonder what it sounded like when Medusa washed her hair at night.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Why do birds love going apeshit first thing in the morning?

Spotted on WeChat:

How does pasta water know when you’re not looking?

Breaking via Reddit:

Gonna start using “with all dude respect”.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I wish I could turn everyone I love into a trinket, so I can keep them forever, because I am greedy and selfish.

Just shared via Instagram:

I wish berries were the size of apples. Just imagine for a second.

Making waves on YouTube:

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

Just shared via Discord:

I like to think of myself as an onion. Peel back the many layers and deep down inside you’ll find a smaller, more anxious onion.

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