I can’t go to war, I have to water my plants. Commentary:Priorities: Water the ficus or save the world? ๐ฟ๐ฆ Priorities! ๐ Related Funny Quotes ๐ค Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes. I lied, there is no sex. Youโre helping me repot plants. If caterpillars are able to sleep for a long time and come out prettier, why cant I? I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. Establish dominance by eating a salad in front of your indoor plants.