Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Maybe aliens don’t visit us because they’re all women and they want us to make the first move.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Psych meds aren’t enough anymore. Hit me with a shovel.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

The mattress in the guest room was perfectly fine until I had to sleep on it once.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Nothing makes you regret an outfit choice faster than when you see teens looking at you and whispering.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

This body is a temple; I suicide bomb every day.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

I think carefully about what I’m going to say and I still manage to say the wrong thing. It’s truly a gift I have.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I don’t hate you, but I hope you run out of hot water before you’re finished your shower.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.