Wordgag 🎅

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

I’ve tasted long-term relationships, I’ve tasted casual dating. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 9 p.m. ..!

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

The dead bodies on Mt. Everest remind me that it’s perfectly fine to stay home and be lazy.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

An easy way to check if you’re attractive: send a “Hey” DM and see if they reply.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

I invoiced my boss two extra hours for the dream I had about work last night. I’m considering that overtime.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

I’m surviving motherhood, one teenage meltdown at a time.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Getting stoned when you have a cat is awesome because it will just walk in and I’m immediately cracking up. Like, look at this dude, I bloody love this guy.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

The one thing I’ve never had in my car’s glove box is a pair of gloves.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

“Are you seeing someone?” Like a hallucination, therapist, or a guy?

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,663

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Reddit:

Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.

Just shared via YouTube:

I have tasted sending long paragraphs, and I have tasted saying OK. I highly recommend saying OK.

Live now on Slack:

Had a fight with an erection this morning. Beat it single-handed.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Hey, sorry I can’t go out tonight. I already showered and got into bed, and now I’m busy rubbing my feet together like a little grasshopper.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Is losing your mind a hobby?

Spotted on TikTok:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

Just landed via Messenger:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

Shared recently on X:

How many of y’all are “burn a CD” and “lime wire” old?

Shared recently on WeChat:

Flirting when bored can really get you into some unwanted situations.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Life hack: put on an apron at home and people think you’re super busy doing important stuff even when you’re not.

I hate it when I do the math about where my money went, and it all adds up. No one robbed me; I didn’t lose it. It was really all me.

3 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When I realize I was both the victim AND the suspect in my own financial mystery… 🕵️‍♂️💸😂

budgeting, finance, hate, humor, i, lose, math, me, money, personal, personal finance, self blame, spending, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Animals are 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

0

1 month ago

animal, animals, humor, instinct, know, minutes, nature, newborn, old, wit
“Girls just want to have fun!” No, I want one million dollars cash.

0

2 months ago

cash, desire, dollars, fun, girls, humor, i, just, million, money, want
All we needed to be happy in the 90s was music and cigarettes.

0

3 months ago

90s, cigarette, cigarettes, happiness, happy, music, nostalgia
I like how the Tooth Fairy got the job, and then subbed it out to everyone’s parents. That’s called “business savvy.”

0

2 months ago

business, business savvy, childhood, fairy, humor, i, job, outsourcing, parents, savvy, tooth, Tooth Fairy
Cats must think we’re so weird for constantly harvesting their poop.

0

2 months ago

animal, animal behavior, behavior, cat, cats, funny observation, harvesting, humor, observation, pets, poop, think, weird
Funny that all this nonsense just stayed in people’s heads before Twitter came along.

0

2 months ago

before, came, communication, heads, just, media, nonsense, people’s, people’s heads, social, social media, thoughts, Twitter

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on Slack this month:

Just accidentally closed a tab I’ve had been meaning to read for the past two years.

11 shares on X this month:

Babies sighing is so funny to me. My dear, the time to sigh has not come.

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

Remember that your face is literally a combination of hundreds of generations of people who fell in love!

72 shares on YouTube this month:

Buying groceries with no food stamps should boost your credit score.

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

Turns out the honeymoon phase lasts forever when you pick the right partner.

66 shares on Threads this month:

Typos keep me humble. Every email is a gamble.

30 shares on Threads this month:

This chapter of my life is called ‘at least the rent is paid’

66 shares on Snapchat this month:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

31 shares on WeChat this month:

I wanna be 14 again and ruin my life differently. I have some new ideas.

69 shares on Twitch this month:

Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Y’all ever postpone an outfit? Like, nah, let me save this for a better day? Same.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

Worrying is just worshipping the problem.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

There should be a day between Sunday and Monday called Hang on a Second.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Doomscrolling: because who doesn’t love anxiety as a hobby?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

Why are there people outside at the same time as me? It’s my turn.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Do not take me to an escape room. I was a c-section. Someone is gonna have to come get me.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

I’m seriously considering adoption. Who wants me?

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

You can tell me what you want, but alcohol and eye contact are a dangerous combination.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

When I moved into my new igloo, my friends threw me a surprise housewarming party. Now I’m homeless.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

All I’m dealing with is broken people. Lord, if I’m a mechanic, please tell me.

Going viral on WeChat:

I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn. It’s dead yarn now though.

Just shared via WeChat:

We can’t all be underemployed creatives. Someone in the group chat needs to know what an insurance is.

Shared recently on Slack:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?

Making waves on Slack:

I love how we didn’t raise the minimum wage because it would make food more expensive, but then just made the food more expensive anyway.

Just shared via Slack:

Find someone who cares about you as much as Gmail cares about new devices signing into your account.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Stop blaming everyone for all of your problems. Pick one person you hate, and blame them for everything.

Breaking via Discord:

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

Breaking via YouTube:

I’m not a dietitian, but if you eat pizza right at midnight your body doesn’t know if the calories go towards yesterday or today so they don’t count.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

I hate it when I do the math about where my money went, and it all adds up. No one robbed me; I didn’t lose it. It was really all me.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Animals are 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

“Girls just want to have fun!” No, I want one million dollars cash.

All we needed to be happy in the 90s was music and cigarettes.

I like how the Tooth Fairy got the job, and then subbed it out to everyone’s parents. That’s called “business savvy.”

Cats must think we’re so weird for constantly harvesting their poop.

Funny that all this nonsense just stayed in people’s heads before Twitter came along.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨