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Commentary:
"Ah, the ever-optimistic taxpayer 🛣️. Don't worry, you might actually see those roads fixed by the time hover cars become mainstream 🚗✨ #TaxpayerDreams"

day, expectation, fix, humor, i, irony, joke, just, paid, payment, road, should, ta, tax

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

No matter how busy my Sunday gets, I always manage to set aside time to panic about Monday.

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2 months ago

busy, humor, Monday, panic, Sunday, time
I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

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2 months ago

AI, artificial intelligence, ChatGPT, everything, fuss, humor, i, know, knowledge, parenting, technology, teenager, understand, understanding
Ending my thesis paper with “but who cares what I think?”

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2 months ago

academic, ending, humor, i, opinion, paper, procrastination, sarcasm, thesis, think, writing
You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.

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2 months ago

confidence, fear, humor, ID, me, photo, scare, self-esteem
I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

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2 months ago

afford, children, expectations, family, financial, humor, i, living, move, parenting, things, want
Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.

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2 months ago

Arkansas, comparison, funny comparison, geography, humor, just, Kansas, pirates, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

11 shares on Discord this month:

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

74 shares on Threads this month:

We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

58 shares on Threads this month:

Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.

45 shares on WeChat this month:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

74 shares on Facebook this month:

Welcome to college, where every single person is smarter than you, except for the three people in your group project.

72 shares on Reddit this month:

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

53 shares on Twitch this month:

Who called it a shopaholic and not a boughtanist?

13 shares on Reddit this month:

The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready.

41 shares on Pinterest this month:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

46 shares on Reddit this month:

Some people peak in high school. I peaked when I realized I never had to see them again.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

I’m proud to announce that am winning my fight against sobriety.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Spoiler alert: Monday doesn’t care about your feelings.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

I unload the dishwasher backwards… just to feel something.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m accused of being a plagiarist. Their words, not mine.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Pornhub should do a wrap-up of your year like Spotify does.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

“Stop talking about old drama!” God forbid a girl and her bestie enjoy their history lessons.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

“What’s your 5-year plan?” I’ll probably go to the movies next week, I think.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I got Botox, and I asked the doctor, “How many years younger will this make me look?” and he was like, “Zero. You’ll just look like the other girls your age who have also gotten Botox.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I didn’t like my beard at first… then it grew on me.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

If I were a bird, I know who I’d poop on.

Live now on Facebook:

You’re not going to believe this, but I was doing really well, and then your email found me.

Going viral on Instagram:

I don’t understand people who forget to eat. I’m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Making waves on Facebook:

Maybe your baby is crying because he knows you don’t have rizz.

Making waves on Reddit:

Don’t forget to set your clocks back to seasonal depression this weekend.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I need a room full of mirrors, so I can be surrounded by losers.

Shared recently on Slack:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

Making waves on Discord:

Maybe one day a street will be named after me. Or a school. Or a mental hospital.

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Activity Log ✨

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

No matter how busy my Sunday gets, I always manage to set aside time to panic about Monday.

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

Ending my thesis paper with “but who cares what I think?”

You don’t scare me, you’re not my ID photo.

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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