Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

I accidentally relaxed too much, and now I don’t have enough anxiety to get stuff done.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Your life can’t fall apart if you never had it together.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

The human body is incredible. It’s like, “Oh, you’re stressed and sad? Here, enjoy this acne.”

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

If Microsoft Edge is brave enough to ask to be your default browser, you can be brave enough to ask that girl out.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

You don’t read Dostoevsky. You survive him.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

Losing weight in your 40’s: LOL!

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

If you’ve never had a cheeseburger change your mood, you’ve never had a cheeseburger.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Isn’t it beautiful how ‘Bruh’ has stood the test of time all these years.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,760

Funny Quotes Topics

17,769

Funny Quotes Images

15,760

Mar 1, 2026

3,341

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

It was a complicated 17-hour surgery, but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist.

Spreading quickly via X:

We’re limited only by our imagination and some federal agencies.

Spotted on YouTube:

I can’t be bothered with people that can’t be bothered.

Just shared via Discord:

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I can’t believe there was a time in my life when someone had to make me take a nap.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

It is a mistake to say that the people who live a hundred years from now will have nothing to laugh at. They can laugh at us.

Trending via Messenger:

I am so out of shape right now, that if someone yelled “run for your life!” I’d be like “ya’ll go ahead, I’m meetin’ Jesus today!”

Live now on Telegram:

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Just landed via Telegram:

“Date” is just another word for: Jeez, had I known that before, I would have stayed home.

Spotted on Discord:

“New recipe” is code for “less content, but worse ingredients”.

I learned Morse code, and then I couldn’t sleep because the rain kept telling me to go fuck myself.

4 weeks ago

Playful quote about Morse code and rain refusing to let sleep stop the humor.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When Mother Nature becomes a sassy pen pal 😂🌧️📡️

code, communication, frustration, humor, i, insomnia, learned, me, morse, Morse code, myself, rain, sleep, swear, swear word, telling, word

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on Facebook this month:

Sometimes a lover girl, sometimes a dinosaur.

32 shares on Messenger this month:

Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

I hate texting someone something freaky at night, and they reply in the morning like it’s still the vibe. Shut up. The sun’s out. I’m pure again.

98 shares on WeChat this month:

Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”

10 shares on Instagram this month:

Social media has given everyone a chance to be heard, and it was a gigantic mistake.

29 shares on Slack this month:

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

77 shares on WeChat this month:

Me, unwrapping a gift: Oh wow, an item. I love these!

58 shares on TikTok this month:

I accidentally used my dog’s shampoo today, and now I’m feeling like such a good girl.

53 shares on WeChat this month:

If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all: I watched Rebel Moon 2 and the Netflix app worked well. Showed me the entire movie. In color.

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Cats spend two-thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Wild that we could have been foraging for berries and dying off at 33, but we chose this nonsense instead.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Is it socially acceptable to wear pajamas all day if you’re constantly holding a coffee cup?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I love wearing sunglasses. Am I looking at your face? Am I looking at your ass? No one knows.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Toasters aren’t governed by that little dial. They have free will.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Want to come over? We can trauma dump, take a nap, and then order a pizza and watch a movie.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t think we’ll ever see aliens. I bet that they’re just gathering information and waiting for us to destroy ourselves.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,760

Funny Quotes Topics

17,769

Funny Quotes Images

15,760

Updated

Mar 1, 2026

Users Online

3,284

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

My boss told me “It’s not rocket science.” Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

Not to brag, but I can trip over things that aren’t even there!

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

My middle finger salutes you.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

It’s weird when you realize that what you thought was rock bottom was actually somewhere around rock middle.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Just knowing that I have to get out of bed tomorrow is already annoying and it’s not even dark yet.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

The people who “don’t have time” and the people who “always find time” have the same amount of time.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Sometimes you need to turn the music up louder and sort your shit out.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Weekends are a scam, you spend one day exhausted and the other day anxious. Like, what the hell was that?

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at the people he gave it to.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Unfortunately, I am not nonchalant, I will set myself on fire.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

The way Adele works for 6 months and then disappears for 7 years is very much the work-life balance I’m all about.

Trending via Discord:

Back to work after the long holiday weekend, so you’re finally away from the relatives you don’t like, and back with the co-workers you don’t like.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I miss my kids the most when they go to bed and the mosquitoes go after me because they have no other options.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Imagine sex with me. No, not like that, you’re doing it all wrong!

Live now on LinkedIn:

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Making waves on Reddit:

Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

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