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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Make your salad taste better by putting it between bread, meat, cheese, and Big Mac sauce.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

People see me spending money and think I’m rich. No, bro, I’m just irresponsible.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

I’m sorry your man wears his sunglasses on the back of his head.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Working on a laptop outside is an abysmal experience.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Liking a song isn’t enough, I need to be able to call the artist and tell them they did a great job.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

I miss phone booths. We used to train our immune system in those things.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

I just want to find someone that gets annoyed by the same things as I do.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Love when job applications ask for my desired salary so I can choose between not being hired and being exploited for my work.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,341

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I need a long hot meteor shower.

Going viral on TikTok:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

Making waves on WeChat:

Some people change their faces like traffic lights change their lights.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?

Going bananas on Telegram:

Liking someone who likes you back is probably really good for your mental health.

Live now on Messenger:

Babe, wake up, it’s stupid outside!

Making waves on Threads:

Sorry, I’m late. I got caught up at home being happy.

Breaking via Messenger:

Church should be less preachy and more eat-y.

Live now on Instagram:

If I were a category, I’d be “miscellaneous.”

I love you to the refrigerator and back.

0
I love you to the refrigerator and back.
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Commentary:
Ah, the modern-day love story – forget the moon and stars, it's all about the fridge now! 🌌❤️🍔 Whoever said romance is dead clearly never experienced the joy of late-night snacks and midnight fridge raids together. 😂🍴 #RelationshipGoals

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on WeChat this month:

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

14 shares on WeChat this month:

My favorite part of adulting is borrowing money from myself and paying myself back.

37 shares on Reddit this month:

How much longer do we have to keep pretending that Pilates isn’t a sex thing?

32 shares on WeChat this month:

I love befriending yappers. They bring the yapping out of me. Then we yap together. Yapping is so much fun.

74 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Can I sell my feelings on ebay, I don’t want them anymore.

20 shares on Messenger this month:

Have I made bad decisions when I was drunk? Sure. But have the sober ones been any better? Not really.

88 shares on Snapchat this month:

Spent the day decorating the house for Christmas and my wife spent the day re-decorating the house for Christmas.

76 shares on Threads this month:

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

69 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m “I can’t sit like that for too long” years old.

99 shares on X this month:

I’m so hungry, I could eat my own cooking.

Trending Topics 📁

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Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I wanna be crazy rich. I’m already crazy, so I’m half way there.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I didn’t mean to mimic your voice, I just had to know what it felt like to sound like that.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Big decision to make? Sleep on it. Have a nightmare. Then you’ll be operating on pure adrenaline and will choose more quickly.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry your man wears his sunglasses on the back of his head.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Before I had kids I was only vaguely aware that Saturday had a 7am.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when the iPhone corrects ‘Omw’ to ‘On my way!’. Man, I am not that excited.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I would like even faster food.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Best friends: they know how crazy you are but still choose to be seen in public with you.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,481

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

Sometimes people come into your life — and they need to stop doing that.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Summer body? Folks, I’m cosplaying as a potato that’s seen some things.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

There is nothing like a little tomato soup to soothe the soul, even if it’s cold, over ice, with a celery stalk and vodka.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

The secret to a good marriage is that it’s all about give and take. Giving each other frequent back rubs and ordering lots of takeout.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Summer is here. Always put on some suncream to help the rain run off.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

The subtle art of surviving this life with grace and dignity.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

The lion is actually pretty concerned right now.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Some woman is out there right now, pregnant with Leonardo DiCaprio’s next girlfriend.

Making waves on X:

We just accepted air fryers and never once questioned how air fries things.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

My gf doesn’t really like it when I talk about my ex, which means I now have a lot of stories from college where I’m just alone for some reason.

Breaking via Snapchat:

As a sales clerk, you want to shout after some people as they leave the store: “Are you sure you’ve really REALLY touched everything?”

Freshly posted on Instagram:

The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Shared recently on Reddit:

It’s nice to have a moment to breathe before reality knocks the wind out of you again.

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m only drinking a lot of beer tonight because I need the room in the fridge.

Just landed via Discord:

How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Just landed via YouTube:

If my memory gets any worse, I’ll be able to plan my own surprise party.

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