Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

It’s cool how seeing a less flattering photo of an attractive friend does not change my perception of them at all, but seeing one of myself makes me want to jump off a bridge.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

My unemployed neighbor with an unlimited firework budget would like to wish everyone a happy 9th of July.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

My body is a vessel for various dips.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Parents be like “Boys are easier,” and then their daughter has to save the family from ruin.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you. Ironically, smoking bacon will cure it.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

Thank you, Facebook memories, for constantly reminding me of the shitty taste in men I had for the majority of my life.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

I want to be rich enough where I’m not offended by the price of beef jerky.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Just once I’d like to read a medication label that says: Warning, may cause permanent weight loss, increased energy and wrinkle removal.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,552

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me using Microsoft Word, losing my revision.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Girls will be like “I have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

Live now on Messenger:

I’m not lazy, I’m an inactivist.

Just landed via Instagram:

I typed my name into Google’s search bar and it immediately auto-filled to “Doesn’t even listen to instructions” before crashing under the weight of disappointed search results.

Spotted on Discord:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Shared recently on Instagram:

They need to invent a dishwasher with a window on it. I have to know what goes on in there.

Spotted on Discord:

Someone needs to make an app for a Tamagotchi that you keep alive by going offline.

Going viral on Instagram:

If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?

Just landed via Discord:

AI could never steal company time the way I do.

I need a room full of mirrors because I want to be surrounded by winners.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Surrounded by winners? More like the ultimate 'me time' retreat! 🏆😂🪞

confidence, full, humor, i, mirror, mirrors, motivation, need, room, self, self-confidence, surrounded, want, winner

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

0

2 months ago

after, around, art, art critique, art museum, banger, casual, casual talk, critique, expression, humor, museum, museum visit, painting, saying, slang, talk, verbal, verbal expression, visit, walking
I’m a single issue voter. I’m single and it’s an issue.

0

2 months ago

dating, humor, issue, life, politics, relationship, single, single life, voter
There’s a fat man inside me dying to get out.

0

2 months ago

body, body positivity, dying, fat, fat man, get out, humor, inside, man, me, positivity, self-image
I successfully avoided the red-eye flight and got the much milder pink eye flight.

0

2 months ago

avoidance, eye, flight, humor, i, joke, much, pink, pink eye, red-eye, travel
In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

0

2 months ago

asked, boss, communication, effort, employees, everyone, humor, keep, me, morale, motivated, motivation, office, stop, stop talking, talking, workplace
On Twitter, you will always find someone who is tweeting your thoughts but with better grammar.

0

2 months ago

always, better, communication, grammar, humor, irony, media, social, social media, someone, thoughts, tweeting, Twitter

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Threads this month:

Imagine Pinocchio roasting you for 5 mins straight and his nose didn’t move an inch.

93 shares on Reddit this month:

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

39 shares on WeChat this month:

I just want someone who can read a book with me in silence, and then do ungodly things sometimes.

87 shares on Threads this month:

A good substitute for love and and personal fulfillment is a big bowl of fries.

50 shares on Messenger this month:

Sex is cool, but have you ever had garlic bread?

90 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t miss calls, I stare at them.

73 shares on TikTok this month:

Actually, this email could’ve been a meeting. We could’ve spent an hour on the clock talking shit and gossiping. Someone could’ve brought bagels.

79 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Why is there so much day left at the end of my energy?

55 shares on YouTube this month:

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

36 shares on Slack this month:

According to a study, people believe anything that starts with ‘according to a study’.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

If I were a bird, I know who I’d poop on.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Googling what ASAP means, and having a panic attack.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Surround yourself with people who google the menu of the restaurant beforehand.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

Gonna eat birthday cake all day because it’s someone’s birthday out there, and we’re about to celebrate together, stranger.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

When they say screen time is bad for you, they just mean the ones at work, right?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

I’ve never wished a man dead, but I’ve read some obituaries with great pleasure.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

I’m sorry I used air quotes when I said we were friends.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro — it’s not personal.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

People aren’t so bad if you stay indoors and don’t talk to them.

Trending via Pinterest:

My washing machine is over here taking load after load, like Bonnie Blue.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m not moody; I’m just on shuffle.

Just shared via WeChat:

I’m so old, I still drink my coffee at home in the morning. From a real cup.

Going viral on Telegram:

Refusing to attend my brother’s gambling intervention until they agree to call it a slot shaming.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I need to start hiding my money from myself.

Trending via TikTok:

If humanity is so smart, how come it took thousands of years after the wheel was invented for someone to put them on a suitcase?

Broadcasted on Messenger:

A little sign under the doorbell that says, “think twice, adventurer.”

Spotted on YouTube:

A selfie only a mother could like.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I need a room full of mirrors because I want to be surrounded by winners.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

I’m a single issue voter. I’m single and it’s an issue.

There’s a fat man inside me dying to get out.

I successfully avoided the red-eye flight and got the much milder pink eye flight.

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

On Twitter, you will always find someone who is tweeting your thoughts but with better grammar.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨