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Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

A moth flies into your face out of nowhere. You could ask him why he does that, but what would you do with the information?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m not a perfectionist. I’m more of a good-enoughist.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “I know it’s hard, but you’ll be okay. Here’s a coffee and a million dollars.”

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Netflix subtitles be like “speaking foreign language”. Bro, translate it!

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

This summer went by so fast, I didn’t even get a chance to lose any weight.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Practicing how I’m gonna explain to the aliens that baseline and Vaseline do not sound the same.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

I’m not making any resolutions. I think it’s time for the years to be better, not me.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

Every cat is a little celebrity to me.

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Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

A thing I never realized about being an adult is that you will always be cleaning your kitchen. No matter if you get takeout, no matter if you’re gone all day, you will be cleaning the kitchen.

Just shared via Telegram:

My husband said I use a lot of makeup, so I showed him some makeup tutorials on TikTok and I don’t think he’ll be making that mistake again.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Not leaving the house and not having contact with other people. The punishments of my childhood are now my hobbies.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Saying “essentially” is a more sophisticated way of saying “basically.

Making waves on Instagram:

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Changing your mind is an underrated activity.

Just shared via YouTube:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Going viral on Pinterest:

In my years of experience, people who disagree with me are usually wrong.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Taylor Swift should write a song about people who don’t return their shopping carts to the corrals.

If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?

1 day ago

Funny Quotes

Humorous quote about family clues, highlighting playful family dynamics and stealthy footsteps.

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Commentary:
Sounds like a family game of "Guess Who?" but with footsteps instead of faces! 👣😂

coming, even, family, footsteps, humor, member, relationship, speed, stairs, tell, weight

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74 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.

13 shares on Slack this month:

Trying to explain to my cat why she can’t jump off the balcony, even though I want to as well.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

The question I ask myself most often is, “What would a jury think about this?”

25 shares on WeChat this month:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

87 shares on Slack this month:

Hey (with the intention of making your fries my fries).

32 shares on Snapchat this month:

My future husband is probably enjoying a nice summer with his first wife… but the seeds of discontent are there.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

Films and television have led me to believe that masquerade balls have a higher mortality rate than most wars.

99 shares on WeChat this month:

I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

43 shares on X this month:

Thinking of starting a religion around cheese.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

All my bills say “Outstanding.” I guess I am good to go.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

I swear the air gets heavier around 6 p.m. on Sundays. You can feel the Microsoft Teams energy approaching.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

I used an air fryer for the first time tonight, and I feel like I just discovered fire.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Hiccups became less popular. I never hear people hiccuping anymore. What’s going on there?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Breakfast in bed: where your cozy blanket turns into a crumby crime scene.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

The real hack is pouring all that lover girl energy into yourself.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

Don’t wait until you’re on your death bed to let them know how you feel. You may be too weak to raise your middle finger.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

White, black, yellow, brown, Democrat, Republican, man, woman, straight, gay, transgender, Jew, Christian, Muslim, young and old — you will all taste the same to the zombies.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

I’m so old, I used to block people by simply holding the door shut.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

You’re in her DMs. I’m accidentally reposting reels of Tibetan foxes because I don’t know how to use the app anymore.

Spotted on Instagram:

Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you.

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Activity Log ✨

If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

As a pigeon mother, I would never let my pigeon daughter hang around the station. That’s really no place for a young pigeon lady.

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

Don’t invite me if there’s nowhere to sit down.

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Activity Log ✨

If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?

Keep the laugh going 😂

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

As a pigeon mother, I would never let my pigeon daughter hang around the station. That’s really no place for a young pigeon lady.

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

Don’t invite me if there’s nowhere to sit down.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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