Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

I just love the lack of privacy in the pharmacy line. Just standing there shouting out my name, date of birth, and exactly what is wrong with me for the world to hear.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

I asked my dad what his favorite joke was. He said, “I can’t pick a favorite. I love you and your sister equally!”

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

I’m addicted to following the rules I made up. And also breaking the rules I made up.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Buying a new phone isn’t even satisfying anymore. It’s literally just your old phone with a haircut.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

An evil genius rising to a position of power is bad but it makes sense at least. Feels insulting we’re constantly seeing evil idiots doing it instead.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has copied:

Just because talking is for you doesn’t mean that starting a podcast is.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

I’m not joining no alternate Twitter app. If this gets taken down, I’m starting a family.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

My favorite things about Texas are definitely toast and chainsaw massacres.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

This year has been the perfect blend between me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Naming my first daughter Piggleigh Wiggleigh.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,276

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Today, I started a 28-day no-swearing challenge, which I will restart tomorrow.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

It’s not my fault that when I said you looked “stunning” you assumed I meant in a positive way.

I’m looking forward to tomorrow. It’ll be much like today, but different enough to confuse me.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Every day is a new puzzle piece, and I still haven't found the edge pieces! 🧩😅✨"

anticipation, confuse, confusion, daily, daily life, different, enough, forward, humor, irony, life, looking, me, much, routine, today, tomorrow

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.

0

5 months ago

book, book club, club, dislike, frustration, group, humor, just, need, opinion, people, read, reading, same, vent
80s movies: Let’s go to the future! Today: Let’s go back to the 80s!

0

5 months ago

80s, 80s movie, back, decade, future, humor, movie, nostalgia, past, time, time travel, today, travel
My body feels like it’s aging in dog years.

0

2 months ago

age, aging, aging sign, body, dog, dog years, feels, health, humor, joke, sign, year’s
I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

0

2 months ago

Amazon, finding, humor, i, irony, online, preferences, shopping, stop, technology, things, wish
Sometimes I’ll drink a ginger ale and eat a Biscoff cookie and sit up in kind of an unnatural position and pretend I’m on a Delta flight.

0

4 months ago

airplane, ale, biscoff, biscoff cookie, cookie, delta, delta flight, drink, eat, flight, funny habit, ginger, ginger ale, habit, kind, position, pretend, sit, sitting, sitting position, snack, sometimes, unnatural
The word “misread” can be misread as “misread.”

0

2 months ago

humor, language, misread, pun, reading, spelling, word, wordplay

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

75 shares on Discord this month:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this Thanksgiving party started.

98 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me attempting to flirt: So do you like doing things?

33 shares on Threads this month:

Whoever told you there’s no such thing as a stupid question lied.

75 shares on Facebook this month:

After a month away and enough pasta to scare an Italian grandma, I can confirm: too much Parmesan? Never heard of her.

74 shares on Telegram this month:

78 shares on TikTok this month:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

96 shares on X this month:

How my weekend was? Light, dark, light, dark, Monday.

61 shares on Instagram this month:

Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Elections is like waiting for the results of a biopsy, except half your family hopes it’s cancer.

26 shares on Reddit this month:

If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the first twelve digits of pi.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

It’s amazing, when it’s your birthday you really feel the love from family, friends, lovers, former dentists, yoga studios and various smootheries.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I could never work in an aquarium. I would have a penguin under my shirt at the end of the shift.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

They should invent a weekend that goes by slowly.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

You can always gauge my mood by the type of animal videos I share: sweet puppy videos or a cat smacking the shit out of someone.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

I’m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

My tattoo means that I can’t be trusted with $200.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Working my first office job. Is it normal to have nothing to do?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

Whoever came up with the spelling for “receipt” was an idiopt.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

Some people identify as funnier than they actually are.

Spotted on Telegram:

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

Making waves on Instagram:

All arguments are solvable. The trick? Get naked.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I am never hungrier than when I leave the dentist and told I can’t eat right away.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

You’re over 35. Better go pee before you leave, pee when you get there, pee while you’re there, and pee before you leave.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Source? It was revealed to me on a walk.

Going viral on Reddit:

If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales.

Spotted on Facebook:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Trending via Slack:

I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.

Going viral on Messenger:

Boss: Why do I have to always come and find you? Me: Because a good employee is hard to find.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m looking forward to tomorrow. It’ll be much like today, but different enough to confuse me.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.

80s movies: Let’s go to the future! Today: Let’s go back to the 80s!

My body feels like it’s aging in dog years.

I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

Sometimes I’ll drink a ginger ale and eat a Biscoff cookie and sit up in kind of an unnatural position and pretend I’m on a Delta flight.

The word “misread” can be misread as “misread.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨