I’m looking forward to tomorrow. It’ll be much like today, but different enough to confuse me.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

Make every hug more interesting by mysteriously whispering, “the Dark Lord stands at the crossroads!”

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

I enjoy the freedom of speech, because if you let crazy people talk, they’ll totally tell you they’re crazy.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Nowadays an “all-nighter” means I didn’t have to get up to pee.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Quitting my job to focus on being in love.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.